To change schools or not to change and when to change

From what you've said, I think a SEN school would be a more appropriate setting for him. Mainstream schools can only do so much for SEN children, especially those with severe needs (and I mean, such as needing to be watched so as to avoid them climbing things they shouldn't or escaping from classrooms). Once the EHCP has been put in place the school should be able to apply for funding for a teaching assistant just for him, so he has one to one help, but it will probably only be for a certain number of hours per week, not full time. I was very anti-SEN school for my granddaughter, I very much wanted her to stay in mainstream school, but a similar thing was happening with her and her mum was being called to the school on a regular basis, and my granddaughter was temporarily excluded numerous times. She finally started at a SEN school a couple of years ago and she's blossomed. Her behaviour is so much better, she's less stressed and there's less to trigger her (much smaller classes, more one to one attention from the teachers, a much quieter atmosphere and no problems if she needs time out, she can just take herself off to a sensory room or a quiet room to calm down). Her attention has been diverted back to her learning and she's doing really well in all subjects, and excelling in some. She's also, far more importantly, so much happier! The teachers understand autism, understand how to get the best out of her, and they have the specialised knowledge that needed. I really wish we'd gone down that route from the very beginning. 

We are having similar problems with my nephew. The first few years of primary his teachers were great and able to manage him without additional help but this year his teacher didn't seem to have the skills or patience. It appears she was simply treating his traits as bad behaviour and that is when all the problems started. Then lockdown happened and despite daily efforts for a couple of months, we were not able to get him back full-time after lockdown even with a classroom assistant in place and the option of a separate SEN class within the school. A couple of hours was the longest he stayed. 

He is quite capable academically but with asd & adhd he has problems settling and focusing. We don't know how to get him back now and we feel the local SEN school is inappropriate for him as most of the pupils there have much more severe learning difficulties .

Can I ask if the transition of changing schools for your Granddaughter went smoothly ? 

It went very smoothly. The school ensures that pupils of similar ability are grouped together in a class, and for their age, obviously, so although there are a lot of children there that have far more severe difficulties, she's in with children of her level. She's bright as a button and really keen to learn but mainstream school just wasn't doing it for her. They were very good and very accommodating, but at the end of the day they have to consider the other pupils too, and if their lessons are being disrupted by one child, as they were with my granddaughter, they have to do something about it eventually. She wasn't officially diagnosed when she was in mainstream school, though everyone involved in her care and education accepted that she was most definitely autistic. So she went to a "halfway house" SEN school for 3 months whilst they assessed her and decided if a SEN school was most suitable for her. During that three months she recieved her diagnosis (it had only taken 7 years!), so she went on to a full time SEN school then. There were no problems transitioning, she absolutely loves it there (she's just had her school report and it's the best one she's ever received!), and has made some good friends. I'd highly recommend it. I was so against it. I was scared she'd be 'labelled' if she attended a SEN school, and that she wasn't severely enough affected for her to be there anyway. I was wrong on both points, thankfully. 

It went very smoothly. The school ensures that pupils of similar ability are grouped together in a class, and for their age, obviously, so although there are a lot of children there that have far more severe difficulties, she's in with children of her level. She's bright as a button and really keen to learn but mainstream school just wasn't doing it for her. They were very good and very accommodating, but at the end of the day they have to consider the other pupils too, and if their lessons are being disrupted by one child, as they were with my granddaughter, they have to do something about it eventually. She wasn't officially diagnosed when she was in mainstream school, though everyone involved in her care and education accepted that she was most definitely autistic. So she went to a "halfway house" SEN school for 3 months whilst they assessed her and decided if a SEN school was most suitable for her. During that three months she recieved her diagnosis (it had only taken 7 years!), so she went on to a full time SEN school then. There were no problems transitioning, she absolutely loves it there (she's just had her school report and it's the best one she's ever received!), and has made some good friends. I'd highly recommend it. I was so against it. I was scared she'd be 'labelled' if she attended a SEN school, and that she wasn't severely enough affected for her to be there anyway. I was wrong on both points, thankfully. 

That's a very positive story and outcome and exactly what she needed by all accounts. It's great to hear positive stories like this and goes to show, in the right environment, they can prosper and flourish. Brilliant !