‘Autistic’ rage (meltdown???). What do you do with it?

Been in turmoil today caused by rage (I had to suffer a situation at work for longer than I could tolerate before I could get away)

When this happens I just end up swallowing all the hate then feel totally scooped out: empty, numb. There’s no-where for it to go.

How do you handle it?

Oh, this just occurred to me, did I have a meltdown?

Sorry, late diagnosis so more retro-learning about myself and re-examining passed experiences.

Any thoughts welcomed and appreciated, friends.

Parents
  • :( Sounds like you had a tough one. Hope you're feeling better.

    If I could send some advice back in time to my professional self I think I would have told him to have a really good list of lies and be prepared to use them, guilt free, to get out of situations; be more honest with myself about what I could actually handle - and then only only sign up for 70% of that; literally put some 'buffer time' in my calendar to recover from difficult situations (obviously depends on your job but stuff like booking a meeting room, for an hour for myself only - or booking something offsite so there is some travel time involved)

    In short - I wish I had been a bit more creative and smarter with putting my own needs in front of the job...

Reply
  • :( Sounds like you had a tough one. Hope you're feeling better.

    If I could send some advice back in time to my professional self I think I would have told him to have a really good list of lies and be prepared to use them, guilt free, to get out of situations; be more honest with myself about what I could actually handle - and then only only sign up for 70% of that; literally put some 'buffer time' in my calendar to recover from difficult situations (obviously depends on your job but stuff like booking a meeting room, for an hour for myself only - or booking something offsite so there is some travel time involved)

    In short - I wish I had been a bit more creative and smarter with putting my own needs in front of the job...

Children
  • Thank you JJ

    My (very understanding) boss is back in today.

    I can talk through the things which were causing the rage with her. I was trapped and couldn’t get space to process.

    It was a perfect storm which meant there was no one else around for me to vent to or to take over so I could get away.

    It’s given me indications of some issues at work which need resolving - that’s practical stuff I can do, something I can fix which makes me feel good.

    I definitely need to put something in place as a plan B for next time I’m in that situation. An escape route.

    I’m still processing my feelings and the situation; such an impact.