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Can anyone help me please

NAS73987

Hello, 

I am a 33 year old female and I have been sitting in the fact that I am on the autistic spectrum for really quite some time now.

There are just so many reasons. Socially, emotionally, just the way I am really.

I have two children, one who 11 and is diagnosed with Adhd and sensory processing problems and has asd traits. His last school wanted to re-refer him for another asd assessment as they said it was so clear he was on the spectrum but masking and I would absolutely agree.

My other son who is older (15), has been put on a neurodevelopmental pathway by his teachers at his school and who I believe is absolutely on the spectrum as does he. He’s very high functioning but absolutely there, always shown classic signs of asd but I’ve never pushed for diagnosis as he gets on so well. 

Anyway, after that bit of family information, I just so strongly believe I am there on the spectrum too and I have just accepted that this is who I am. 
I would have liked to know with certainty but I could have lived without knowing “officially” until this year that is.

I went through a massive mental health crisis at the end of last year/beginning of this year and was put under the crisis team for the first and last time. 
Upon meeting a physiatrist for less than an hour I was given a diagnosis of eupd. 
Now I can understand why upon my presentation at my lowest point in my adult life that conclusion could be drawn but I just don’t agree with it. 
I have also taken part in CBT therapy in the past where I was given a diagnosis of generalised anxiety disorder and I have also struggled with disordered eating in the past too.

I would like to go about getting all this revised and asking about the possibility that I in fact have high functioning autism because it just fits. 
It’s like I can feel it inside that that is why I struggle if that makes sense. 

What do I do to try and find out? I have no idea where to start and I am so scared about speaking to anyone about this. 
A professional I was working with during my mental health crisis suggested I may be autistic and it felt like such a relief to have my feelings understood but I just don’t know where to go with this and will they just laugh at me and say I’m crazy?

Thanks. 

  • This may be a worthwhile article to read considering some of what you've mentioned. https://thepsychologist.bps.org.uk/volume-32/august-2019/autism-women

    Uncovering our true nature, or 'authentic' selves should make life much more manageable. There is wisdom in knowing my limits and my strengths. There are also so many great tools to help us sharpen our skills. I didn't realise I had the ability to hyper-focus, to learn the sort of things I'm capable of understanding or to use my senses to create an aesthetically indulgent surrounding. I have no problems finishing a thing partly because I am driven to finish everything I start.

    Anxiety can be caused by a core self - literally screaming - to get out. It has been incredibly settling to allow my deeper self to come into alignment with my words/actions. This kind of synchronicity of self and mindful-ness makes life so much better!

  • If you're in the UK you have two options. You can either go the NHS route or the private route. Both have pros and cons. The NHS route is free but takes longer, anywhere between 1 and 4 years, is common, though around 2 years seems to be the average. The private route is faster, mere months usually, but very expensive. So your financial situation will probably dictate which you route you go down. If you go private, check out the resources on this site for suitable, local private assessment centres. If you go the NHS route you'll need to speak to your doctor and ask to be referred for an ASD assessment. Make sure you're prepared before speaking to him; download the AQ10 and/or AQ50 test, fill it out and score it. That will give you an indication of whether you are on the spectrum, then take it with you when you see the doctor, because that will preempt him giving it to you and telling you to go away and fill it in for him! Also, it's a good idea to list the traits of autism and how you fit them, giving an example of how each one affects you in your day to day life, and share this with the doctor too. If he agrees that you might be on the spectrum, he'll refer you for assessment. Eventually you'll receive a letter telling you whether you've been accepted for assessment or not. Once accepted (because hopefully, your doctor will have supplied enough evidence to persuade them), you'll be put on the waiting list and then it's just a case of waiting until they send you an appointment. Again, it's a good idea to spend this time making notes, recalling specific instances when you struggled in any aspect, from a early as you can remember. Talk to your family, and see what they remember. You'll probably be asked to take someone with you to the assessment who knew you well as a young child (usually a parent or a sibling) but don't worry if there is no one, they'll still be able to assess you. And no, they won't say you're crazy. More and more people are getting diagnosed later in life, having slipped through the net during childhood. Just make sure you're well prepared for your doctors appointment. Good luck!