Can we change our stims?

Exactly! It's like the equivalent of ear defenders but for physical touch, or maybe even more senses than that. Bliss!

Mantra said:

My scalp seems to have got the worst of my habits lately. I think it's because the sensations feel 'closer' and drown out the further away sensations in the rest of my body. I'm wondering if I can find something else head-based like massaging my head or hair... That tiny sensation of pain that comes with scratching feels so good though.

Yes - direct connection to the brain - feels sooooo good.

Untoward said:

I find it is like a super stim - more effective than the others and what I do when very agitated or overwhelmed.

Excellent 

Thanks, everyone, for your replies and ideas!

Great to hear quite a few of you have changed stims and found other things to explore.

Fascinating that the skin picking thing is so common.

My scalp seems to have got the worst of my habits lately. I think it's because the sensations feel 'closer' and drown out the further away sensations in the rest of my body. I'm wondering if I can find something else head-based like massaging my head or hair... That tiny sensation of pain that comes with scratching feels so good though.

Will explore objects in my hands a bit more as well. I have a tiny seashell about the size of a baked bean that I found with a crinkled edge that my nails can just fit around, so that's been giving my nails something else to explore. Hopefully that helps, too.

I think you can change your stims. When I was a little boy I had various stims on my face which looked very weird to others (but I hadn't realised). The kids at school made fun of me and did impressions of them, which was how I found out that I was doing it, and afterwards I stopped because I didn't want to be made fun of.

Over the years I have had different stims. The one that has always stuck by me has been repetitively touching certain places on both sides of my body, usually on the fingers or hands or near the wrist. I used to do it on my face as well (particularly around my nose) but I realised it must have looked weird and managed to stop that now. I also used to rub each eyebrow, which is a nice sensation - again I have to do it the same on both.

I used to do loads of skin picking/peeling. The sensation of the skin peeling away is so satisfying and takes the attention away from whatever else is going on. I started doing it really really badly in lockdown whenever I was on video calls for work.I would do it until my heels bled.

Thankfully I have managed to almost completely stop that now since developing a new stim - a kind of rhythmic back and forth twisting of my hand at the wrist. I find it is like a super stim - more effective than the others and what I do when very agitated or overwhelmed. It's like I'm turning down the volume on everything by focusing on it. And I can do it under the desk so people on the video call can't see.

I do the pebble thing. I have one that is just perfect, size shape, density and texture. I tend to squeeze it between the thumb and forefinger of one hand until it shoots out from between them and catch it in the other hand, then repeat. It is very satisfying.

I've done exactly this, I've had an issue where I pick at my skin when I try to relax and it often causes injury and bleeding and have a reasonably substantial scaring from it. Since finding out I'm Autistic other options to stop it were offered and I tried a few and the one that stuck was one of those pop it sensory toys, specifically a round one with an uneven number of dots and I find popping the pattern in that satisfies whatever it is my body wants in the picking.

I also did something I think was similar years ago, I grew a beard to stop me picking at my face which was becoming an issue and now I pull and roll my beard hair instead. 

So, short story long, I think its totally possible to move to a different stim, you might just have to try a few to find something that satisfies in the right way.

Gidday Mantra, 

I hope we can change our stims.  I pick at my fingers until I bleed - I like the pain as it feels real and makes me be present.  My fingers don't look nice.  I am trying a few other things:

• Firmly squeezing a hard massage ball in each hand - that still causes pain but (hopefully) no damage - but thats only at home.
• I carry a couple of small polished stones and just move them around in my hands and fingers - great when I'm out and about as other people don't notice it
• Shake my hands around when I am alone - proactively (before I feel the need - I read that proactive stimming is a thing!)
• Very firmly grip the edges of the chair if thats all I have when I really need something.

I've only been trying these other things for a few weeks and I'm hopeful at least some of them work.

My other stims are common ones - mainly legs bouncing around to their own song when I'm sitting where nobody can see me.  I only recently realised I do this, but have been doing it for decades - feels great!  I'm doing it right now...

Good luck-  but I don't feel I've given any advice - just options that work for me to get me through unpleasant things.

I've also found interrogation scenes work well for me - demanding answers in quick succession about any subject focusses my brain elsewhere as an add-on to the hair pulling, crying, jiggling etc.

They're getting used to me. 

You are a genius and I'm going take your advice and test the next time I'm at the dentist.

Hiya

I've investigated my body and tested many stims that offer different levels of soothing and comfort or overload.   It needs to be intense.

For just burning time, the leg-jiggle works well up until the point of procedure.      I need to sit still for most things like blood tests so the head rubbing works well - lots of ear and brain-noise - it allows me to leave the other arm limp..

I also scratch until I bleed - the feeling of the greasy blood both delights and disgusts me - causes brain overload so good for diversion.      I can rub my hands together until I can smell burning - but that causes long-term damage and pain so is for special occasions only.

For my daily stomach injections, I rub/pull my hair with one hand and ruffle my eyebrow with the other - it gets both my hands well away from the injection site and I can keep my eyes closed so I don't see any needles.

There are 3 separate pains - needle going in, the liquid being injected and then a few minutes after, it feels like someone touching a lit match to the injection site - hurts like fluck!

Have you found and 'useful' stims?

I think you can. Plastic kindly suggested I develop a few harmless ones to cope in some situations. I hadn't considered that they could be consciously developed.

I have a couple of little harmless ones that have always been there, but I paid no attention to ever. Since they took some of my teeth two years back, I have some big wopping dramatic ones involving quite a lot of rapid head rubbing in ever increasing circles that have appeared out of nowhere and worried my husband. I'd no idea why until I figured out what the behaviours were. They happen every time the sensations in my mouth get too much because of the missing teeth; often after I've eaten and it's really stressing me out. 

I think Plastic's right I do need to pick one that won't interfere when I'm not coping in the dentists and see if I can channel the urge consciously there.

If you like to scratch, can you find a garment that is soft and comfy next to the skin but had a rougher texture stitched to the outside that's good to scratch. Or some thing scratchy as a fidget toy. Some way to stratch and protect your skin.

I don't see why you couldn't change your stims to something else, you had to pick up your current stims from somewhere so why couldn't pick up new ones from somewhere else maybe try looking something up online to help with stimming you might come across something