hi, new user here, I haven't had much luck with forums before, hoping this time it will be different.
I am a 24, soon-to-be, 25, year old man with autism, dyspraxia and possible dyscalculia. I'm from England.
I've been a computer addict for as long as I can remember and it was only just recently that I finally started to outgrow it and decided to fix my life.
I tried to kick the habit for years, I made some progress but it was never permanent and I would always fall back under.
The problem is I have been in receipt of DLA and ESA ever since I was 16? All because I was heavily addicted to the computer and I constantly turned down work and college opportunities after I left school. In the end, I was put on benefits but I believe I am capable of so much more and do not want it to be this way.
Now here's the thing, many people would dream for an early retirement but not me, I actually want something to make something with my life. I'm so unbelievably bored and feel so worthless right now. I literally just sit on the sofa all day now thinking about how life could have been different and waiting to hear good news but it never comes... You see,
Pretty much all of my social relationships were online since I left school, except for my small family. Unfortunately, these online relationships were holding me back so I had no choice but to cut contacts with them and ever since then I have become really sad and lonely. My plan was to go to college and make real life friends but at age 25, this was not going to be easy. I looked into specialist colleges as an alternative, enquired in a couple, was really excited because this really appealed to me but then received the news that in order to attend specialist colleges you have to be on EHCP, which is ceased after 25. I was really put down after this... If only I had kicked this habit years ago at age 18 after I finished school, or even 20, then I might have been fine. I never made this much effort before and now that I have, nothing is going how I wanted it to ! I really feel like this is my last chance at life, what do I do?
The only person I had to talk to online about my life, got fed up with me and cut contacts with me.
Now I have no one to talk to and I feel like I'm about to fall into depression.
I know what I want to do I just don't know how I'm going to achieve it.
I could have written this a bit better but my current mood isn't allowing me to.
Ask me anything you want.
Thanks..
