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Introvert or extrovert?

Meeples

I have always considered myself an introvert. I find social situations draining and I have no problem with my own company, which fits the definition of an introvert. However, I'm not sure that I really am. I am also a natural performer, fascinated by other peoples lives and stories and, when it goes well, I get a real buzz from connecting with people. So, could I actually be an extrovert? Could these introvert traits be the results of social anxiety, masking really heavily and/or being overstimulated? Wouldn't those things also make me find socialising confusing and exhausting and find having time by myself easier?

Its just a thought that's been rolling around in my mind and I wondered what everyone else thought.

Parents

  • I'm a twin - brother is NT, I'm aspie.      I realised I was very different to everyone else very early on - everything they did was crazy and inefficient.

    I measured that odd + introvert = bullying target.    I also noticed that odd + extrovert = popular & mysterious.

    I made the conscious decision to create a huge, extrovert persona to deter / confuse bullies.   I could effectively be aloof and arrogant but with good humour and it worked very well.and kept the bullies away.   My eidetic memory abilities meant I could be a chameleon and be an instant expert on any fashionable subject.   I'm like Neo in the Matrix - plug me in and I've learnt it all.

    This was around 1980 - I saved my pocket money and bought a cheap bass guitar and old synth and because I was into electronics, I built an amp and created a school rock band - along with two aspie friends who could play guitar and drums enough to fake 'musical skills'.  Smiley.       We did a few school assemblies.   Smiley    By sixth form, I had a better synth so I convinced my friend's sister (probably aspie too) to be a singer so we became a sort of low-budget Yazoo doing covers of Depeche mode / New Order / Soft Cell etc.   Smiley        I met my future wife in sixth form.

    This massive, extrovert persona has served me well my whole life - it's got me jobs and promotions and because I wear my heart on my sleeve - I'm, an open book, I'm so very obviously aspie that I attract other aspies - I'm easy to deal with - and all my long-term friends are either diagnosed or undiagnosed aspies.

  • in reply to Plastic

    That's quite an amazing strategy. Well done! Wish I'd thought of it when I was at school. 

    Do you find that living in a created persona exhausting though?

  • in reply to Meeples

    Yes and no - I'm very highly motivated so I go my direction and others can either keep up or fall behind - so in a way, it's very liberating to not give a crap - the haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate - and my family and friends are always my priority.    Smiley

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