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Do family members have the same or similar ‘autisms’?

Elizabeth

The individual in my life with whom I most easily communicate is my cousin who has autism as well.

When he and I talk, conversation flows in a way I don’t experience with others. It’s a joy to talk to him, and effortless - we think in similar ways in terms of our manners of processing information, our communication styles, our curiosity, our enthusiasm, and our interest in going deep.

I am curious about whether I would have the same synchronicity with someone with autism who was not my cousin. Does the fact that he and I are so closely related mean that ‘our autisms’, so to speak, are more similar than they would be otherwise?

I should note that this is my maternal cousin, and that my mother, his aunt, is the member of my immediate family whom I believe most obviously manifests autism. She is in her early 80s and has never been assessed.

What are your thoughts about whether family members can have similar ‘autisms’?

Have you experienced this situation in your own family circle, and if so, how were your and your family member(s)’  ‘autisms’ similar?

Elizabeth

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  • i was diagnosed at 62. i come from a large extended asian family. out of 20 first cousins, 9 aunts and uncles, and the off spring of my cousins (i've never married, due to asd, that dreadful scourge), i feel that those who hang with me are aspi-like, and with tendencies very like mine. otherwise, they don't want to be around me and my quietness.

    my uncle, mom, aunt... we're pretty similar. sort of high anxiety, always in motion (even if internally), fussy fussbudgets, kind of negative-oriented, cautious, not gamblers or hell raisers.  socially inept.  all four of us are animal lovers and very sensitive to them.

    my uncle very creative in an engineering sort of way. my mom, the flip side:  creative but in an artsy way. i feel like we are three peas in a pod. i'm like in between my uncle and mom, i have some of each.   i'm twice exceptional (that means twice screwed up), creative, but pretty off kilter, alas. 

    i've brought up my asd diagnosis with a few cousins and other relatives. afaic, it's the family dirty laundry. not unlike if great grandma ran a whorehouse by the tracks. er, by that i mean an "inn" near first street...

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  • i was diagnosed at 62. i come from a large extended asian family. out of 20 first cousins, 9 aunts and uncles, and the off spring of my cousins (i've never married, due to asd, that dreadful scourge), i feel that those who hang with me are aspi-like, and with tendencies very like mine. otherwise, they don't want to be around me and my quietness.

    my uncle, mom, aunt... we're pretty similar. sort of high anxiety, always in motion (even if internally), fussy fussbudgets, kind of negative-oriented, cautious, not gamblers or hell raisers.  socially inept.  all four of us are animal lovers and very sensitive to them.

    my uncle very creative in an engineering sort of way. my mom, the flip side:  creative but in an artsy way. i feel like we are three peas in a pod. i'm like in between my uncle and mom, i have some of each.   i'm twice exceptional (that means twice screwed up), creative, but pretty off kilter, alas. 

    i've brought up my asd diagnosis with a few cousins and other relatives. afaic, it's the family dirty laundry. not unlike if great grandma ran a whorehouse by the tracks. er, by that i mean an "inn" near first street...

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