Tolerance of other half diminishing

My other half is getting less and less tolerant of me and our autistic child.

In anger he says things like he just wants to be left alone (not easy in a lockdown) , he wishes he wasn't the only NT in the house, my diagnosis means I will never get better, I never mean to upset him but I always do,  he can't handle us both talking at once, I can't use autism as an excuse etc. 

Every time we fall out he turns it back to me and it is always my fault. He can talk down to me sometimes as if he is teaching me like a child. 

I can't tell when he is getting angry and so sometimes he will suddenly blow and shout and storm out the house. Usually it blows over and he is fine the next day but I am left constantly walking on eggshells wondering what I will do to upset him next. 

Sometimes he is great and patient with our child and then sometimes he can't tolerate his noises or his incessant talking or his constant movement.  Nothing has changed about how our child acts but his tolerance of it has decreased. 

I just don't know what to do. 

Parents
  • 1. get him to do a regular walk every night, so he has his space, or maybe angling. or an hour each day on a playstation where he is not disturbed. ( use a headset ).

    2. next, i talk over people as well. i now talk less, i watch the other person ( listen to their tone carefully )  and create more spaces for the other person to speak. When they do I let them talk more and also hold my tongue. Its very hard to do. .

    is he working ?

    he may be getting cabin fever ---- i have been in many cabin fever situations and the key is activity and/or get away from each other for regular periods of time ( supermarket ? ). I have seen many fights between NTs when they completely crack..

Reply
  • 1. get him to do a regular walk every night, so he has his space, or maybe angling. or an hour each day on a playstation where he is not disturbed. ( use a headset ).

    2. next, i talk over people as well. i now talk less, i watch the other person ( listen to their tone carefully )  and create more spaces for the other person to speak. When they do I let them talk more and also hold my tongue. Its very hard to do. .

    is he working ?

    he may be getting cabin fever ---- i have been in many cabin fever situations and the key is activity and/or get away from each other for regular periods of time ( supermarket ? ). I have seen many fights between NTs when they completely crack..

Children
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