What changed for you after assessment?

I think the therapeutic support is an important feature of autism support, but perhaps less readily available than the practical support so there is less emphasis on supporting autistic people in that way.

New job is up and down. Who knew it was so difficult to make friends when you know nothing about them to mirror?! I thought I'd find it easy but I've realised normally when I make online friends I seek out people with shared interests. I feel like I'm flailing around desperate to make a friend.

I've definitely struggled more since lockdown and wondering if it's connected to not being able to mirror.

Hope the support works for you x

I suppose when I say I don't need support in day-to-day living - I was reading into what kind of support is available for people who struggle with autism and I found a lot of resources around financial benefits and practical support with living arrangements - I don't feel those things are applicable for me. The support I do access is counselling which has been invaluable in managing anxiety and stress at work. 

Maybe it is cheesy but I know what you mean :D I feel like I 'function' at work but never quite got rid of the suspicion that everybody thinks I'm 'weird' so I never feel properly comfortable or settled.

good luck with the new job x

Working from home has definitely made me see how much I rely on mirroring. I've always known I do it but never associated it potentially with autism, but now I'm seeing it in a different light now I'm experiencing the loss of that ability. 

I think I need to mention it at work sooner rather than later and at least explain how I feel even though I don't have a definitive diagnosis. I just don't know how I'd deal with finding out if I'm not autistic after mentioning it to people I'm less familiar with.

I'm half diagnosed (preliminary, awaiting full) I'm starting to understand myself better and forgive myself more, but I do still have doubts.

Like you I'm in a job I want to make something of, and remote working has disrupted my mirroring and ability to integrate. It was this breakdown that caused me to go for diagnosis - my ability to mask, and resources for doing so had been taken away and I was obviously struggling.

It has changed the type of mental health support I'm getting which is a good thing, but it is up to me to have the courage to make any changes I need  in life and work 

I find it interesting that you feel you don't need support but simultaneously access support. 

I've not had a diagnosis, I'm at the same point as you, but since recognising that autism may explain things about myself I have realised that I do need that type of support. I'm successful in my career but my difficulties with unpredictability and the need for routine are definitely a big wall for me. I'm also struggling in some ways with the pandemic as I've got a new job and cannot see my team so I have nothing to mirror, and therefore I don't know how to act, but on the other hand I love being in my house working from home every day as it is a bit of sanctuary for me. 

I really hope to gain understanding of myself from both myself and others. My difficulties with emotions has definitely caused problems in other jobs and I really want to thrive in this new one, not just survive (cheesy, I know)

ty, autumn. in terms of being diagnosed, i suppose i'm glad i did it, and it turned out 'positive', if that's the correct use of that. like, it hasn't exactly been a 'positive' experience. a pal of mine, who i feel is pretty clearly asd, i don't think has any interest in a diagnosis. he seems ot accept his idiosyncracies as what he does. it's a little weird, cause we are pretty similar, and he'll comment on our strange similarities, and he knows i am asd. idk if he thinks he has 'it.' probably, tho. seems disinterested.

understood... thank you for your response. 

I’ve always had autism written next to me in my records so from the start, I was pigeonholed with it as a toddler. I had started a degree and saw that I was massively different from my classmates so that’s what prompted me to get tested. I don’t really want to open up about my problems since they are quite personal and don’t want to be recognised online on this forum by someone who may know me. 

Thanks for your reply... do you mind if I ask what prompted you to get assessed, and what problems you've seen since the diagnosis?

Thanks - I'm glad it's made a difference for you. I have a feeling it will be worth at least asking the question for me :)

To be honest, I really regret getting a diagnosis assessment for autism now. It’s caused nothing but problems but that’s just my experiences. For you, it might not affect you so much (and I really hope that it doesn’t make things worse!)

I know I've found since i've been more open (with my boss at least) about what I'm feeling is that there's less pressure to be positive if I'm just not. In turn, when I am positive, it's much more genuine. 

I hope things get better for you xx

Definitely I’m glad it’s helped you too.

np 

Everything - but then I like clarity about these things, and I even considered the possibility after I was diagnosed that I was mis-diagnosed. After some thought I'm confident they've got it right 

It's allowed me to access additional support at work, even just to reassure folk that if they think I'm being "off" with them, it isn't intentional (it settled a huge misunderstanding between myself and a work colleague, and gave me an insight into just how differently I see things).

I'm stepping back in meetings, instead of getting frustrated, and taking time to understand how people work together a lot more. I can understand the dynamics as an observer, even if I struggle as a participant.

My personal history made sense - for the first time everything slotted into place. That was the most valuable thing - I know what I'm working with, and I've started to accept myself and be a lot kinder to myself because of it. 

It gave me access to some self-management strategies and insight which initially I wasn't aware of. Using a mood chart or making gaps between tasks or asking people to explain things in a different way no longer seemed trivial ideas any more. They're actually essential to maintaining my well-being. 

I'd spend some time doing a hypothetical. What would it mean for you if you had a positive diagnosis? What would it mean for you if you were assessed and you had a negative diagnosis?

When I was weighing it up, I decided I had nothing to lose. Plus, getting some time with a psychologist when up to now trying to figure out what was going on with me had been sheer guesswork was an opportunity (yes! I saw it as that) I couldn't pass up.

i finally found out why i have had such a miserable life, and ........... maybe just as magnificently - that it was actually even more miserable than i had experienced. so i could look back, and say, "wow, your existence really reeked. you're the kind of person who people might read your life story, and say "wow, his life really reeked." " kind of an eye opener, to say the least.

i hope you fare better (that will not be hard). 

sorry to be so negative. i'm feeling this is an asd forum, and maybe i can just say what it is. if it were an NT forum, i'd make up a boat load of useless but nice sounding junk. 

tricky to figure out sometimes!

From other responses here, I feel like maybe it's about accepting you don't need to change. At least if you have a name for it there are strategies to manage any stress or anxiety that goes with it. Good luck, and thanks :)

I'm glad it's helped you. It's a relief isn't it.