I need somewhere nice to live

Some of the northern and welsh places i mentioned are relatively cheap compared to southern uni towns

I think university towns are what you're after but the rents are high because the university attracts people for work and for the ambience of being somewhere "nice".

I live in a suburb of a city and quite like it, it has good transport links to the university so this area has lots of open minded people and I don't feel like I stick out quite as much as I did when I lived in a council estate (where both sides of my family were born and raised so not snobbery, I just never fitted in). 

Have you ever tried to get a bit of respite by taking a break in a nice area? I like St Andrew's for a break as it's not too far away and has a good ambience. I also like the borders as I seem to get on with wide open spaces and the proper darkness at night. I get good deals on 5pm which often include meals. 

I know some people do writers or artist retreats in nicer areas but I am not creative so I don't go in for them. I also know that people of faith can go stay in convents for a bit because when I was at school we did a day visit to one and met someone who was staying for a spiritual retreat. 

Sometimes just getting away for a bit can be enough. I had a friend who tried to join what I'd call a commune but they rejected her because they saw her autism as a defect and basically said they didn't want to have to support her in the future if she wasn't useful to their lifestyle but I'm sure other communities might be more welcoming for a break if not to live permanently. 

Hi, Roswell:

I couldn’t quite get a read on your initial post. I hope you’re okay and not actually experiencing abuse from your neighbours?

I agree with what Cookiesmum1986 said.  I find it helpful to deliberately choose my community, when that’s possible (affordable, etc.). Then, even if I don’t necessarily meet people right away - I usually find it takes at least a solid 12 - 18 months to make one or two friends - I enjoy the physical environment and find it soothing.

If that’s not possible, and I say this having been in the situation, I find having earplugs on hand to be invaluable. I once had to change communities quickly for work reasons and I did not have time to be picky about where I lived. My new upstairs neighbours and the neighbours beside me were loud - nice people, just loud, at least to my ears. After unsuccessfully talking to each of them twice about the issue, and realizing they did not consider themselves to be loud and had no intention of trying to quiet down, I realized I simply had to adjust - with earplugs.

I don’t enjoy the feeling of earplugs in my ears, but experiencing that sensation was far better than enduring noise and feeling upset at people with whom I had to live for the remainder of the year. The earplugs solved the issue completely.

Elizabeth

I live in a town like that and i was talking the other day with an aspie that maybe cos it's quiet and got a uni is why there's so many aspues here.

Places I've spooted that look good inc Totnes, Aberystwyth, Stirling, Exeter, Lancaster, Mcynlleth, Carmarthen, Stroud, Todmorden and Hebden Bridge, Kendal and lots more places

I want to live somewhere away from rough and loud people. I want to be around creative or educated people. 

I'm not able to cope well with much noise or unexpected things happening. I had neighbours in social housing I couldn't cope with. They slammed doors, had barbecues in the garden shouting to one another, had dogs running around off leads right up to me, fixing their motorbike and swearing right in front of the shared hallway. It was traumatising and horrible.

That was the place I got railroaded into taking by the council after asking for housing help. I was told if I refused it I might not get anything else. 

I'd like to live in a university town or where hippies live. Nice people. Open-minded people. I have few connections, it's challenging. I'm isolated.

What do you like? 

I moved to Edinburgh for uni but hated it and moved home west when I graduated. Husband is half English but prefers living in Scotland even though the job opportunities are better down south. 

I used to think I'd like to live near the coast but I realised I hate the wind so that's a no go but I do like to holiday by the sea. Urban environments are a bit claustrophobic to me. I don't mind about distance to family but it was important to husband. 

Write down what you really want and what you really don't and then research appropriate areas.