I need somewhere nice to live

Hi, Roswell:

I couldn’t quite get a read on your initial post. I hope you’re okay and not actually experiencing abuse from your neighbours?

I agree with what Cookiesmum1986 said.  I find it helpful to deliberately choose my community, when that’s possible (affordable, etc.). Then, even if I don’t necessarily meet people right away - I usually find it takes at least a solid 12 - 18 months to make one or two friends - I enjoy the physical environment and find it soothing.

If that’s not possible, and I say this having been in the situation, I find having earplugs on hand to be invaluable. I once had to change communities quickly for work reasons and I did not have time to be picky about where I lived. My new upstairs neighbours and the neighbours beside me were loud - nice people, just loud, at least to my ears. After unsuccessfully talking to each of them twice about the issue, and realizing they did not consider themselves to be loud and had no intention of trying to quiet down, I realized I simply had to adjust - with earplugs.

I don’t enjoy the feeling of earplugs in my ears, but experiencing that sensation was far better than enduring noise and feeling upset at people with whom I had to live for the remainder of the year. The earplugs solved the issue completely.

Elizabeth

Hi, Roswell:

I couldn’t quite get a read on your initial post. I hope you’re okay and not actually experiencing abuse from your neighbours?

I agree with what Cookiesmum1986 said.  I find it helpful to deliberately choose my community, when that’s possible (affordable, etc.). Then, even if I don’t necessarily meet people right away - I usually find it takes at least a solid 12 - 18 months to make one or two friends - I enjoy the physical environment and find it soothing.

If that’s not possible, and I say this having been in the situation, I find having earplugs on hand to be invaluable. I once had to change communities quickly for work reasons and I did not have time to be picky about where I lived. My new upstairs neighbours and the neighbours beside me were loud - nice people, just loud, at least to my ears. After unsuccessfully talking to each of them twice about the issue, and realizing they did not consider themselves to be loud and had no intention of trying to quiet down, I realized I simply had to adjust - with earplugs.

I don’t enjoy the feeling of earplugs in my ears, but experiencing that sensation was far better than enduring noise and feeling upset at people with whom I had to live for the remainder of the year. The earplugs solved the issue completely.

Elizabeth

Earplugs wouldn't work for me Elizabeth I'm afraid because I have shellshock from abusive situations I've been in and even just feeling the vibrations of people slamming doors or behaving in certain ways triggers me. Where I live currently I don't get abuse from neighbours but sometimes I get abuse from my dad and sometimes it makes me feel very, very low indeed. In the past two flats I had of my own I had problematic neighbours who were either abusive or just very loud and frightening.