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It's amazing how much rejection and judgement hurts

Roswell

I don't know why I let it bother me. I should be able to rise about it.

Right now there are people who are in prison who may never be released, who spend 23 hours a day locked in a cell. Surely that is hopelessness?

Or the people detained in mental hospitals who are Autistic and live in fear of being assaulted by the staff.

Then you could be a mouse, imagine the terror you would feel at being eaten by a bird of prey, for you are only small and they can fly high above and swoop down on you.

This seems to me how it works. Have you noticed? NTs exclude us and are very calm-headed about that. They're like, oh yeah, they deserve it, they won't follow the rules. Then when we adapt and create our alternative lifestyles, the NTs complain that we're excluding them. So let's say an Autistic person goes walking in the countryside in flamboyant clothes, as I do - the birdwatchers and cyclists get annoyed with me.

Parents

  • I have found that it's all about where you pitch yourself.      I'm a nerd - so I hang out with other nerds - and within that group, there's lots of undiagnosed Aspies so I find them quite relaxing.       I wouldn't dream about going into a sports bar or biker gang - I know myself and I know where I fit.

    Why do you go out to deliberately make yourself attract unwanted attention?       NTs fear anything different - so their fight or flight  response will make them react - and if they feel brave, they will challenge you / insult you / hassle you until they feel superior and safe within themselves - the same way crows will mob a kite - testing its right to exist in their space.     

    If NTs see something that looks like them, it poses no threat so they don't even notice it - they go about their little lives.

    Knowing you will attract that attention, surely you would want to avoid doing that - just wear 'normal' clothes and walk  the path through life without all the hassle - be like the invisible man - free to exist and no-one able to 'see' you.   Smiley.

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  • I have found that it's all about where you pitch yourself.      I'm a nerd - so I hang out with other nerds - and within that group, there's lots of undiagnosed Aspies so I find them quite relaxing.       I wouldn't dream about going into a sports bar or biker gang - I know myself and I know where I fit.

    Why do you go out to deliberately make yourself attract unwanted attention?       NTs fear anything different - so their fight or flight  response will make them react - and if they feel brave, they will challenge you / insult you / hassle you until they feel superior and safe within themselves - the same way crows will mob a kite - testing its right to exist in their space.     

    If NTs see something that looks like them, it poses no threat so they don't even notice it - they go about their little lives.

    Knowing you will attract that attention, surely you would want to avoid doing that - just wear 'normal' clothes and walk  the path through life without all the hassle - be like the invisible man - free to exist and no-one able to 'see' you.   Smiley.

Children
  • in reply to Plastic

    Yes, I've found community and campaigning groups full of aspie types, like environmental, animal rights, social justice, Green Party, etc; as well as Quaker, buddhist, vegan groups; and done ok in running and badminton groups, as well as adult education classes, yoga, tai chi, herbalism classes. Climber groups seem full of them.

    I don't know how many are actually AS, but plenty are aspie enough for me to enjoy (tho it's me who struggles to do the real connect), and plenty seem ok to indulge my quirks. It took a long time engaging with these groups, loads of persistent trying with different peopke, loads of filtering and false starts, but I got there.