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Who's with me?

NAS68158

I see a lot of posts on here about relationships. particularly autistic people who are facing the struggle of finding partners and dating in a neurotypical world. I sympathise with them I've been on Tinder since October last year, I never had a single date whilst my flatmates were entering relationships left, right, and centre. It's tough, this wrecked my self-esteem making me feel worthless and unloveable, also making me feel unattractive and fat (causing me to lose 20% of my body weight in desperation). I was trying so hard to fit in and make myself desirable but each time I was dealt a crushing blow. 

Anyway, enough about me, why can't the Autistic Society set up a dating site? A place where autistic people can meet other people, who actually understand what we're all going through, improving our chances of finding partners. I think it would be a great help to many people. 

  • Did a bit more digging around and deleted my previous comment.

    I thought a link to this thread might be more useful having read it.

    www.reddit.com/.../

  • I always think the best way of meeting, being with, and dating is not to deliberately do it.  A dating site, true, at least tells you the person is interested in some sort of relationship but also it is a magnet for those wishing to take advantage of people who may be vulnerable.

    My opinion is that the best way to find people is to do it by common interest.  Friendship then comes first, not an urge to get into bed. Friends may end up just platonic, to meet up with but not get romantically involved with, but dating sites are prone to have people with whom there is nothing in common and no attraction to.

    See if you can find a club to join which you may be interested in - rambling, book club, history, archaeology, photography, art, whatever,  and go for a few meetings.  Being autistic does not mean you are not good company and others may admire your particular autistic traits.  Many people with a strong interest often share similar quirks to autistic people and some may be autistic even if they don't realise it.  In my case I would rather others accept me for what I am rather than me bang a drum about my autism.  As with many things that initial step can be very difficult to cross, but many clubs hold "open days" where it is easier to see what the club is like.

    I have also seen "singles nights" at museums, art galleries and historic buildings which might be an idea if that is your interest.  

  • Hello. Something like this would be a good idea. People on the spectrum would be able to meet others just like them.

    Unfortunately, there will be people out there that would willingly abuse something like this and take advantage.