Anyone else anxious about getting back to normal?

It is important to note for the sake of others that the reports are only for England.  This is the current situation:

England - extended to June 30th, it is rumoured that shielding will be extended to the end of July and then end.

Scotland - extended to at least July 31st.

Wales - extended to at least August 16th.

I have not heard anything about an extension for Northern Ireland, but the initial twelve week periods ends today.

I do not know how the government can be certain it will not be safe to end in five weeks time, but it will be safe in six weeks time.  Though I am not that afraid of the virus as I do not mind it killing me.  But I obeyed the shielding rules because I did into want to risk taking up a hospital bed that someone else would have need.

But I am very afraid of it ending for a number of reasons, though mine are different.  The only social pressure I have is visiting my dad, I am completely isolated so there is nobody else I could meet other than my sister, and we never met outside of birthdays and Christmas.

One of them is that the social rules have all changed.  Last time I was outside you could just walk around and go in shops.  Now you have to wear masks and queue everywhere and there are one-way systems.  I already avoid new places and situations because I do not know what to do, cannot ask for help, and find such things overwhelming.  Now everywhere is a new place and situation.

Another reason is that I get agoraphobic the longer I go without going outside.  I always used to do my grocery shopping in person just so I had a reason to regularly go out.  Although having now experience online supermarket shopping, I do not like it so would rather be able to do it in person.  But the longest I went before without going out was a month, and it was very difficult going out after that.  But on that occasion I lived with someone so did not have to do it alone.

My main reason though is that a few years ago when I was able to see an autism therapist for a short while, I told them about how I have always suffered from gender dysphoria and found out it was possible to transition.  Because of the way my autistic brain works I had never been able to connect that possibility with myself, and it made me very scared about what I am incapable of understanding.  But because the N.H.S. is very slow I did not get to see a specialist until earlier this year, and they then wait a year before doing anything anyway.  But mentally I have lost the ability to continue to pretending to be the fake identity I used even though my body does not match my real identity.  So I am terrified about anyone seeing me looking and sounding like this.

Because of all that I have still not been outside even though it is now supposedly safe to do.  I have already planned to write to my doctor about these problems later this week, even though I do not think they will help me.  But I also need help with my physical health and being unable to go out will prevent that, even though one of the problems is urgent.  Now I know how to do grocery shopping online, it is only because of medical appointments and visiting my dad that I need to go outside, otherwise I could just stay indoors until I die.

Northern Ireland has updated its shielding programme today, so this the latest information:

England – shielding is until at least June 30th, it is rumoured it will be extended to finish on July 31st.

Wales – shielding is until at least August 16th

Scotland – shielding is until at least July 31st

Northern Ireland – shielding will finish on July 31st.

Northern Ireland has updated its shielding programme today, so this the latest information:

England – shielding is until at least June 30th, it is rumoured it will be extended to finish on July 31st.

Wales – shielding is until at least August 16th

Scotland – shielding is until at least July 31st

Northern Ireland – shielding will finish on July 31st.