What does your Autism mean to you?

I watched a documentary in the 70's about autism and my parents laughingly said 'that's you!' But then my .other remarked, why spend so much time on children who are clearly a dead loss, when there are bright working-class kids who really could do with more investment of time and money. 

To be fsir, only the Kanner's type autism was recognised then, not the more high-functioning forms. 

Another family member started to come under scrutiny in the early 90's and I had inadvertently read some of the things that had been written about me in my medical notes: it was seen as mental illness then. But it didn't come as some resounding 'ah-ha' moment of revelation - the literature on Asperger's just reopened a host of old wounds and lead to a massive falling out with my parents, who then seemed to call into question every thing about my lifestyle all over again. But later on, a therapist where I live now told me it would never have hurt so much if there wasn't any truth to it. 

Now it matters a whole lot less. I have been self employed for over 20 years, so all fears about being unemployable are gone, though the day job can seem like a thankless task at times and only takes me away from more creative pursuits. Then again, the world of Art stinks too.

Now it just seems, all manner of well-known individuals are coming out and it seems to be pretty common. 

I am glad for something ultimately that does confer that strength of being able to think outside the box. Maybe too, finding ways to deal with certain stressful situations with less shame. It suppose it helps to recognise that some of the more difficult aspects of life, for example the bullying at school, not feeling accepted socially, make more sense, though this all came a bit late in the day.

I watched a documentary in the 70's about autism and my parents laughingly said 'that's you!' But then my .other remarked, why spend so much time on children who are clearly a dead loss, when there are bright working-class kids who really could do with more investment of time and money. 

To be fsir, only the Kanner's type autism was recognised then, not the more high-functioning forms. 

Another family member started to come under scrutiny in the early 90's and I had inadvertently read some of the things that had been written about me in my medical notes: it was seen as mental illness then. But it didn't come as some resounding 'ah-ha' moment of revelation - the literature on Asperger's just reopened a host of old wounds and lead to a massive falling out with my parents, who then seemed to call into question every thing about my lifestyle all over again. But later on, a therapist where I live now told me it would never have hurt so much if there wasn't any truth to it. 

Now it matters a whole lot less. I have been self employed for over 20 years, so all fears about being unemployable are gone, though the day job can seem like a thankless task at times and only takes me away from more creative pursuits. Then again, the world of Art stinks too.

Now it just seems, all manner of well-known individuals are coming out and it seems to be pretty common. 

I am glad for something ultimately that does confer that strength of being able to think outside the box. Maybe too, finding ways to deal with certain stressful situations with less shame. It suppose it helps to recognise that some of the more difficult aspects of life, for example the bullying at school, not feeling accepted socially, make more sense, though this all came a bit late in the day.

I was a child of the 80’s, I don’t remember any hearing anything about autism except that there were a handful of autistic children at my primary school, in my year and the year below. I remember when I was 7, one of them and the brothers of two of the others talking about autism one day. Well the brothers were talking about their sisters being autistic then the boy piped up with “I’m autistic”. It never occurred to me to ask what it was though. I remember that same boy told me years later, when we were 14 that he was autistic. I asked my dad that evening “what is autistic” and he just said something about it meaning difficulties with socialising and emotions. Weirdly, around the same time, that same boy asked me if I had Aspergers. At the time I said no, because I wasn’t diagnosed then and I didn’t have a clue what Aspergers was. Apart from that my mother always referred to me as being a strange child and she often said I was vulnerable but she never offered any further explanation. 
I would love to get hold of my medical records. Especially the old Lloyd George cards. I do remember a lady coming to our house to do some sort of assessment when I was 10 or 11. I remember just talking on and on about my pet gerbils for however long she was there. I would like to see if there is anything Autism related in my notes from when I was a child. 
Everything does make more sense now but I still can’t help wish that I’d been diagnosed when I was a lot younger!