It was a long time ago but - - -

My first proper introduction to how horrible people can be was around 1975 at the age of 13 ,someone I thought was a friend all be it a very casual one  ,same age, played at his house ,lived across the road and at the same school decided to play a prank on me ,I got a phone call one evening after school from the least popular girl in our year and after a bit of chat she asked if I wanted to go out with her ,I said yes ok ,after the call ended it rang again this time my "friend" was on the line laughing about how dumb I was ,he had got his older sister 18 at the time I think  to pose as this other girl to fool me into agreeing to go out with the least popular girl in our year ,who I thought was ok anyway ,I was obviously picked out as an easy target ,likely to bring success to the venture or perhaps they thought I would be laughing with them   . Now I was lucky I grew up in a large village /small town and would have been subjected to much worse bullying in a city probably would not have coped at all and I know others will have suffered way worse in terms of violence and intensity so I know I was lucky  ,I had my share of physical and mental bullying but this was another level of deception, planning and organisation and it utterly crushed me smashed what little confidence I had and could not understand why anyone would do such a thing and taught me not to trust  ANYONE ,this  is a long forgotten memory and only recalled it after reading a book on  aspergers  about adolescent naivety ,now what I would like to know is, is this one of the signs of aspergers or was I just naïve and dumb . I would also be interested in others with similar tales to tell , phycological bullying always seems to cut deeper .   

Parents
  • When I was a child I had been invited to a birthday party (a unusual event) and when party games were starting I said that I didn't want to do that, and asked whether I could go for a walk around the garden instead. At the time, it didn't occur to me that it would be seen as weird and impolite, especially since they let me do it.

    A few weeks afterwards I got another party invitation, which I was very excited about. (I appeared to be "on a roll.") It didn't bother me that I didn't know the girl in question very well, I suppose it should have done. Some other children in the class seemed to know all about it, and came up to me sometimes to ask me if I was still looking forward to it, and walked away smiling when I said yes.

    On the day I walked to the address I had been given, knocked on the door, and it was answered by a puzzled looking man who then had the job of explaining to me that there was no party, and he knew nothing about it. The girl and her friends had set me up and sent me to a random address. As I walked home in tears they stepped out from behind a hedge and followed me home laughing.

    I suppose it was retaliation for my earlier unintended rudeness, but it took me several years to make that connection.

  • People can be truly awful and one consistency through out is others are a constant source of disappointment and as I suspected you all seem to have had  a much tougher time than I .As we get older I think we become much more adept at spotting these things and avoiding them .

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