Published on 12, July, 2020
So I got diagnosed last year at 32 and even though it has answered a lot of question and explained why I react a certain way to things, I’m finding it very difficult to see the positives of having it.
What I mean by this I don’t seem to have any of the positive/useful sides of aspergers, I don’t have hyper focus, well I do but it’s never directed at anything useful, more like a want to play on my pc, I really want to play on my pc, I REALLY REALLY REALLY WANT TO PLAY MY PC! Lol. Also my memory sucks, like I’m always reading/hearing how fellow aspies have a super subject or special interests that they obsess over and know everything about said subjects and can draw on facts about said subject on demand. I lack this, in fact I find it very hard to retain information, I’ll have to repeat a 5 item long shopping list over and over and over from being told what the items are I need to buy up until paying for them. And this goes with everything, making learning something new very difficult.
I have all the negatives though, the social anxieties, the overthinking/over analysing, procrastinating, avoidance, and the many more that come with the condition and it’s really getting me down and making life very difficult. I want to be more than someone who’s on benefits and struggles with everyday simple tasks like bathing, eating, or even just getting out of bed. I want to add just something to the world, I want an ASPERGERS SUPER SKILL! Instead I have nothing, absolutely nothing!
The problem with 'superpowers' is you can't always 'see the wood for the trees'...
Does a bird think of its ability to fly as a superpower? Does an extremophile shrimp that can dive in and out of undersea thermal vents without being cooked think of that as a superpower?
No. Because that's just 'how they are'...
We're the same... think of something you find easy to do that other people seem to find really difficult = superpower...
Do you have an acute sense? Smell, hearing, touch - in everyday life it might drive you mad that you can smell someone's lunch several tables away but sometimes superpowers don't seem that 'super' - Cyclops from the x-men has to wear a visor lest he fry everything he looks at, Rogue 'steals' the powers of any mutant she touches and so has to avoid physical contact with people lest she harms them...
However, not everyone on the spectrum will have any kind of 'super' power... sometimes the result of being bitten by an irradiated spider is simply some kind of painful, debilitating reaction to the radioactive venom.
Try to be kind to yourself, don't take on too much on days when you're struggling and don't overdo-it on days you feel good - balance is key
Best of luck
Original Prankster said:Try to be kind to yourself, don't take on too much on days when you're struggling and don't overdo-it on days you feel good - balance is key
This is something that I am definitely realising and is great advice. Thank you