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Got my assessment appointment ....

Murmu

Hi - I joined this forum a little time ago when I was starting the assessment process. I completed some questionnaires and now have two appointments, both for 2 and a half hours one day after the other. I'm now feeling incredibly anxious - mostly that I am wasting NHS time - that I've managed up until now so why am I pursuing thing and all the reasons I had have evaporated in the face of worry and anxiety. I don't know whether to cancel. I don't know what to expect from the appointments which is making things worse. I also have a questionnaire for a family member but there is no way my family are getting involved so can't get that completed. I know the answers to the questions on it having had previous family discussions but I know that's not the same. I am not even sure what I'm asking for by posting on here just wanted to get the thoughts out somewhere. I don't know whether to proceed or not. I'm so worried that I'll go and be laughed out of the place as an attention seeker. 

Parents

  • Hi Murmu,

    What you're feeling is completely normal, and we've all been through it to a greater or lesser extent on our own journeys to diagnosis. I remember feeling like you do now, part fraud ("I've coped up to now so maybe it's not that bad"), part worry ("What if they say it's not autism? What then?"), and a whole heap of anxiety about not knowing what to expect, having to talk to a stranger in an unfamiliar place etc.

    You absolutely won't be laughed out of the place, nor labelled an attention-seeker, or anything else (well, maybe 'autistic', but certainly nothing bad). The assessments are there to explore the difficulties you have now and in the past, and, in some cases, try to gain a basic understanding of the kind of help you need.

    They literally want you to be yourself—and it's not often that we get to do that as auties. After all, you will be in a safe place with people who understand where you are coming from, and who want to help you access support (if that's what you also want). These guys are on your side!

    I'm sorry your family aren't more supportive and, sadly, that isn't unusual, but it won't in any way jeopardise your diagnosis so please try not to worry too much about that. It's good that you've discussed it with them and can provide some childhood history on your challenges and experiences.

    All the reasons you wanted to pursue the diagnosis are probably still there for you; I know it's a tortuous process, but you'll find it worthwhile even if you decide not to disclose your diagnosis or access additional support. Plus, you'll always be welcome on these forums irrespective of what the assessment says if you feel it is a natural home for you.

    Take good care. It will be okay.

    Nessie

Reply

  • Hi Murmu,

    What you're feeling is completely normal, and we've all been through it to a greater or lesser extent on our own journeys to diagnosis. I remember feeling like you do now, part fraud ("I've coped up to now so maybe it's not that bad"), part worry ("What if they say it's not autism? What then?"), and a whole heap of anxiety about not knowing what to expect, having to talk to a stranger in an unfamiliar place etc.

    You absolutely won't be laughed out of the place, nor labelled an attention-seeker, or anything else (well, maybe 'autistic', but certainly nothing bad). The assessments are there to explore the difficulties you have now and in the past, and, in some cases, try to gain a basic understanding of the kind of help you need.

    They literally want you to be yourself—and it's not often that we get to do that as auties. After all, you will be in a safe place with people who understand where you are coming from, and who want to help you access support (if that's what you also want). These guys are on your side!

    I'm sorry your family aren't more supportive and, sadly, that isn't unusual, but it won't in any way jeopardise your diagnosis so please try not to worry too much about that. It's good that you've discussed it with them and can provide some childhood history on your challenges and experiences.

    All the reasons you wanted to pursue the diagnosis are probably still there for you; I know it's a tortuous process, but you'll find it worthwhile even if you decide not to disclose your diagnosis or access additional support. Plus, you'll always be welcome on these forums irrespective of what the assessment says if you feel it is a natural home for you.

    Take good care. It will be okay.

    Nessie

Children