Work stress/getting overwhelmed query

Hi,

Got diagnosed with Aspergers in April this year, and while it has been helpful to a degree honestly it's almost raised more questions than it's answered as looking into it I've just found a huge list of possible effects it could have to the point that even explaining it to people is difficult besides just dumbing it down to "to literal don't read people". One of the major issues I'm finding currently is in work, I work full time in an annoyingly open-plan office, and most of the time I can cope and just focus on work, but sometimes minor things just seem to either massively stress me out or cause a complete breakdown (honestly not even sure what I'd call it), yesterday for example I had to change 2 passwords, ended up putting the wrong 1 in to often and thus started 3 hours of trying to sort it out as our companies system for it is ridiculously convoluted, and by the end of it was I so stressed out and tense I couldn't calm down and ended up having to go and work from home, which tends to sort me out fairly quickly.

So to the question, is this actually anything to do with Aspergers or is it just entirely separate not coping with stresses well? and if it is related is the best way to sort it actually any different to other people? The person who did the assessment made a point of some things are other people just need to learn how to deal with people with Aspergers, but there is some stuff you need to work on, however I've been finding it very hard to even confirm what is definitely part of it and what could just be 1 of the other things that can come with it. It's made worse as well as I live with a friend who's advice is always "you just need to grow up and deal with stress like everybody else does it's nothing to do with Aspergers", which is mainly her view as her boyfriend has Aspergers as well and doesn't have this as an issue, so at this point I'm just not sure if she's right and is just being harsh about it, or if she's just wrongly working on a basis of "every single aspie is exactly the same so as my boyfriend isn't like that you shouldn't be either as he's my template for aspies"

Thanks in advance and feel free to say she is right and I just need to deal with it, as honestly even know for sure that's it would help, I just really don't know right now as afterwards I always know it's a stupid thing (I mean having a breakdown from locking yourself out of a computer at work is stupid), but it still ends up happening every few months and if I try to go into work the next day I end up feeling crap again, today I tried to go into work and ended up having to come and work from home again as I couldn't cope, but tomorrow I know I'll almost certainly be fine.

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  • Temple Grandin states in her book "the autistic brain" that you cant use Autism as an excuse to not face things you cant do. She is a pretty tough person and I personally like her survivor attitude.  I always keep that in mind and try to fix myself.   But having said that it does make life easier if you have management make simple changes to suit the sensitivities of your spectrum traits. 

    for you I do advise a stop sit back, pull back from the situation, "remove your blinkers", wait 10 seconds ( or take 4 deep breathe approach) and watch your emotions/thoughts { <<<< I found this is the hard bit and still do}  

    ask yourself

    1. why am i so upset about getting my password wrong ?

    2. in 5 years will I even remember forgetting my password, will I care ?

    3. whats the worst that can happen here ?   the staff are all away and I cant proceed with work but so what! just tell your manager u're locked out and sit back. challenge each thought is it realistic.

    BTW i picked this skill up from the "StressControl" f ree classes held in UK ( Dr white, glasgow ).   (There is no space between Stress and Control, ifuare search in your area for this class ( 6 weeks of solid tested knowledge, tested in glasgow )

    I am very like u i get wound up by stupid small things. it is autism related but see if u can control your responses/thoughts ----  this is very difficult I am gradually getting better at it. If i feel I am losing it i go to the loo and take a mini break and challenge my thoughts ( pen and postit pad )

    hope this helps 

  • I just use eWallet app - and problem solved, no more forgotten passwords :) I have a folder for work passwords and the main one for card numbers, web sites etc. The app is cross platforms ie PC, ios and Android, its a life saver for me:) 

  • i need to be more organised :)

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