Who can really explain loneliness?

Apologies. I am struggling due to lack of support from social services. My mother put in a complaint. It's taking ages to get a care assessment. My mother and father are on holiday. Have no offline support at the moment. 

I see no reason to be apologetic - I don't think that feeling lonely is something we should have to justify to each other. And I don't think that it's healthy that there seems to be a social taboo around admitting to feeling lonely and discussing it.

There may be parallels between the loneliness that many autistic people feel, and the problems felt by people like Monroe and Garland. Were they really loved for being the people who they felt themselves to be inside; or only for the public personas which they projected? They may even have felt their success to be somewhat empty, precisely because much of it was based around their physical attractiveness rather than their personalities or intellectual achievements. Too often we're made to feel that we have to fight against our autism in order to be deemed worthy of being cared about. And if we manage to hide our autism successfully, then who is being loved? The true "me" or just our masked alter-ego? Being surrounded by adoring people is no guarantee that we'll feel loved.

I see no reason to be apologetic - I don't think that feeling lonely is something we should have to justify to each other. And I don't think that it's healthy that there seems to be a social taboo around admitting to feeling lonely and discussing it.

There may be parallels between the loneliness that many autistic people feel, and the problems felt by people like Monroe and Garland. Were they really loved for being the people who they felt themselves to be inside; or only for the public personas which they projected? They may even have felt their success to be somewhat empty, precisely because much of it was based around their physical attractiveness rather than their personalities or intellectual achievements. Too often we're made to feel that we have to fight against our autism in order to be deemed worthy of being cared about. And if we manage to hide our autism successfully, then who is being loved? The true "me" or just our masked alter-ego? Being surrounded by adoring people is no guarantee that we'll feel loved.

I appreciate your reply, I think you understand where I'm coming from. I like how you contrasted Monroe and Garland with the Autistic masking. That makes sense. I feel under pressure to be "on" all the time with a lot of people.