I am a NT partner, we have two children age 2 & 4. Things are feeling tough on the marriage front and I feel a bit in the dark about what will help. My husband is not keen on relationship counselling.
What to do about family holidays? They feel impossible as my husband finds the change of routine & setting too stressful. I long to go away, though. I’d be ok managing the children alone, but it feels a bit wrong to go without my husband. Any solutions?
There are conflicts about mess because my husband really doesn’t see it and lets it build up (the children’s and his own stuff, which is never put away). I get tired of picking up after everyone. How to find a practical solution that is do-able for him (he struggles to notice or care about even huge levels of mess).
There are also difficulties around his levels of tension and inflexibility with family life. Mealtimes for him with the children particularly give rise to anxiety: he’s anxious to follow a rigid schedule, and wants them to have the iPad on and not get up, also he wants a parent to sit right by them the whole time without the parent getting up. He gets a bit obsessive about how much they are eating - he want them to be well fed (they are!). It gets very tense. Again not sure how to help this situation!
Any insights or suggestions on any of this gratefully received!
