Do I do it?

Hi

Getting a diagnosis is a very personal decision and you need to weigh up why you want it and what you think you will get from it because, as you say, it's a long process - which means you'll have finished uni before you get your diagnosis.

As far as I know, if you talk to the uni support team, they will do everything possible to try to help you - they really don't want you to fail as it dents their stats so I'd have a chat to them and tell them you're looking at diagnosis.

I'm 53 and was only diagnosed at 42 - I thought I was coping but I'd reached the limits of my ability to mask and cover up my deficiencies so cracks were beginning to show.

Internally, I still feel that I'm only 16 so I'm aware that all those around me seem to be so much more complex in their social interactions - I feel like a child - but others say my attitude to life is refreshingly simple and straight-forward - and my peers all appear to be soooo old in comparison.

Girls are generally much better at playing the social games so are much harder to diagnose - I'd have a read of the topics that come up on here and see if you feel it chimes with you.  You wiil see a lot of common themes.

In my analysis of myself, I have measured that is all boils down to the inability to deal with stress - and the stress is caused by chaos - unpredictable people, situations, out-of-control events - in fact anything where I am not 100% sure of the outcome.  The more unpredicatable the situation, the more stress I feel.  It impacts upon everything - like wanting to be alone (away from chaos) to hating social situations (too much unpredictability) to stress at work (unclear management decisions and poor instructions) etc.

The rest is over-stimulation - too noisy, too bright, too many people, sensory overload caused by clothing, smells etc

And then fatigue - needing down-time to decompress and process - this is exhausting.

A lot of people go on about various on-line tests but the results can be hugely variable depending on your state of mind when doing them.

If you're thinking about diagnosis, go and see your GP with some of your basic evidence - and they should refer you along to the professionals.  I'm told the whole process can take up to 2 years - so time is of the essence - the sooner you see the GP, the sooner it all gets moving.

Good luck.

Plastic said:

Getting a diagnosis is a very personal decision and you need to weigh up why you want it and what you think you will get from it because, as you say, it's a long process

I agree with plastic. As an adult, getting a diagnosis is a very personal decision. I also think that there are a lot of factors to consider - especially, what was hard for me to make the decision was (1) change: I find change difficult to process, if I get a diagnosis, than that itself is a big change, and I might have trouble dealing with it. E.g., I might feel sad about missing out on opportunities when I was a kid, I might feel sad that once diagnosed I can never be undiagnosed. I might worry that social interactions might be different if people found out about my diagnosis. These are a few examples of why this change of diagnosis status might be difficult. It's also possible that one might end up with a negative diagnosis, and this would be a challenge to what one had previously believed in. (2) waiting time: this was a big consideration for me too. I had to wait for 2 years, and there were so many problems with the administration for the diagnosis process (definitely not autism-friendly). It was extremely stressful, having to go to many different appointments, being ignored and not taken seriously, waiting and more waiting. I only got my diagnosis at the very last few months of my degree (and according to the waiting times being 2-3 years, it's certainly possible that I might have finished my degree before I could get my diagnosis). (3) being mentally ready: Although I had thought about getting a diagnosis before I started my postgraduate degree, I waited until I a while into it before deciding I was ready. The reason was that starting a new degree itself requires an extremely large amount of attention. Most of my time and effort was put into adjusting to a new environment, working hard on my course, meeting new people, etc. And pursuing a diagnosis was just too much mental effort to add to the business at that time. Even after I felt I was more mentally ready, having to deal with the bad administration and long waiting times was still very stressful, and actually had a negative impact on my studies. 

I also sympathise with your feelings, about how the diagnosis seems to fit, and that adapting to adulthood seems harder and harder as social demands increase. I think going through the diagnosis myself, had both pros and cons. Cons include all the stress due to the worries about dealing with change and the stressful long waiting times, which had a bad impact on my studies. Pros, I think it has helped me better understand myself, about why some things were difficult. Also I feel relieved and more optimistic about the future. Although I was't able to get any support from the university due to the long waiting time, I feel that maybe the diagnosis could be more helpful in the future if I need to tell employers. 

Plastic said:

Getting a diagnosis is a very personal decision and you need to weigh up why you want it and what you think you will get from it because, as you say, it's a long process

I agree with plastic. As an adult, getting a diagnosis is a very personal decision. I also think that there are a lot of factors to consider - especially, what was hard for me to make the decision was (1) change: I find change difficult to process, if I get a diagnosis, than that itself is a big change, and I might have trouble dealing with it. E.g., I might feel sad about missing out on opportunities when I was a kid, I might feel sad that once diagnosed I can never be undiagnosed. I might worry that social interactions might be different if people found out about my diagnosis. These are a few examples of why this change of diagnosis status might be difficult. It's also possible that one might end up with a negative diagnosis, and this would be a challenge to what one had previously believed in. (2) waiting time: this was a big consideration for me too. I had to wait for 2 years, and there were so many problems with the administration for the diagnosis process (definitely not autism-friendly). It was extremely stressful, having to go to many different appointments, being ignored and not taken seriously, waiting and more waiting. I only got my diagnosis at the very last few months of my degree (and according to the waiting times being 2-3 years, it's certainly possible that I might have finished my degree before I could get my diagnosis). (3) being mentally ready: Although I had thought about getting a diagnosis before I started my postgraduate degree, I waited until I a while into it before deciding I was ready. The reason was that starting a new degree itself requires an extremely large amount of attention. Most of my time and effort was put into adjusting to a new environment, working hard on my course, meeting new people, etc. And pursuing a diagnosis was just too much mental effort to add to the business at that time. Even after I felt I was more mentally ready, having to deal with the bad administration and long waiting times was still very stressful, and actually had a negative impact on my studies. 

I also sympathise with your feelings, about how the diagnosis seems to fit, and that adapting to adulthood seems harder and harder as social demands increase. I think going through the diagnosis myself, had both pros and cons. Cons include all the stress due to the worries about dealing with change and the stressful long waiting times, which had a bad impact on my studies. Pros, I think it has helped me better understand myself, about why some things were difficult. Also I feel relieved and more optimistic about the future. Although I was't able to get any support from the university due to the long waiting time, I feel that maybe the diagnosis could be more helpful in the future if I need to tell employers.