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Adult Diagnosis based off psychological report from childhood

NAS62373

Hi All, 

My name is Sarah, I’m 22 and Im here looking for some advice as to whether it’s worth getting a spectrum diagnosis as an Adult. Ill give you a bit of my back story.. As far back as I can remember I’ve never felt normal or like I could fit in. I really struggled with friends my whole life, especially as a child - I didn’t really know how to make friends or be around people my own age. I had epilepsy as a child so this masked a lot of my problems as it was always the focus when I was younger. As a result I saw many a child Psychologist back then, I was assessed back then and my parents were recommended to seek out a diagnosis for Aspergers. I didn’t actually know this till later in my life and once I looked into it I felt like my life and the struggles I have had finally make sense. All of a sudden I thought maybe my characteristics mightn’t be of a failing Neurotypical but of a succeeding Aspie. I’m happy in life right now, I still struggle with friends and anxiety, however, I’m lucky to have found a great boyfriend to whom I am engaged. This however has opened my eyes further as I’ve noticed that I am “me” around him but not “me” around any of my friends or even my parents. It’s left me feeling a little lonely as I don’t connect with anyone else on that level. It’s like my walls go up and I begin acting. I think I’ve been acting my whole life, I’ve definitely got better at acting the way I should and I can even make friends now but it’s so superficial as I’m not being me, I adapt to the situation at hand and change my personality accordingly. I think this is why I rarely maintain friendships, I find it exhausting. 

Ive taken many an online test and read through all the characteristics of high functioning autism and I really relate to these and have scored on the spectrum in tests.I also definitely see stronger characteristics of Autism when I look back on my childhood. 

I’m sorry for the long post, I’d love to know if anyone has been in a similar situation and how difficult it is to get a diagnosis as an adult.

Sarah. 

Parents

  • Hi Sarah and welcome. I'm an older woman and I realised I was on the spectrum a few years ago, in my mid 50s. I met my partner when I was in my late teens and he is the only person I've ever felt totally comfortable being with - that feeling of being totally yourself and with no need to chat unless you want to, but knowing someone is there if you need them. I remember him commenting some years back that I behaved differently when we were with other people than when we were alone - I hadn't realised that I was adapting my behaviour to the situation. I also didn't notice until after I found out I was AS that we have conversations with little eye  contact -- maybe that's why we feel comfortable together. He didn't want to do the AQ50 but one day I read the questions out to him and scored his answers, and he got a "likely autistic"  score too, so that would explain our deep connection.

    I haven't had a "formal" diagnosis, because a) my GP told me I wouldn't get any support, b) I've read reports of the diagnosis process and found it offputting and c) I was concerned I might get diagnosed as "not autistic"  because I can mask well. I read everything I could find on the internet about Autism, particularly in relation to women, and a few books have helped me too. I realised that nothing would change what I am, and I've used the information to help me cope better with life. I'm sure you will be a successful Aspie, diagnosed or not. Slight smile

  • in reply to Lotus

    Certainly no support at all is possible where I live, so I have to find my own. Using this forum would be an example of that. But I'm also noting that there are quite a few support groups in the UK where people of all ages and experiences seem to enjoy and thrive from each other's company. As for being diagnosed "not autistic", I prepared myself for that prospect with the thought that well if it isn't autism, it's still likely to be something significantly close to deserve a similar approach. My diagnosis could, of course, change in future. Well, perhaps a new diagnosis might actually be more constructive. But I probably would not go out of my way to seek a rediagnosis/new diagnosis, because I obviously do still have a condition that has a very similar life impact to autism. But I would consider something like brain-scanning or DNA testing that might clarify a few things; even if they might change my current status. I would actually like to be a research volunteer, as I would definitely enjoy knowing more about how things work. And I like the idea of sharing experience.  Part of the reason for being somewhat blase about my diagnosis is that I am living totally out of the NHS system, and so do not have to worry at all about GPs and specialists who feel they want to put my medical records straight. So the thought that someone could live with self-identification alone is a completely acceptable one for me. I too debated not bothering with a diagnosis, though don't really regret it, but also know - even now - that I could live without it.

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  • in reply to Lotus

    Certainly no support at all is possible where I live, so I have to find my own. Using this forum would be an example of that. But I'm also noting that there are quite a few support groups in the UK where people of all ages and experiences seem to enjoy and thrive from each other's company. As for being diagnosed "not autistic", I prepared myself for that prospect with the thought that well if it isn't autism, it's still likely to be something significantly close to deserve a similar approach. My diagnosis could, of course, change in future. Well, perhaps a new diagnosis might actually be more constructive. But I probably would not go out of my way to seek a rediagnosis/new diagnosis, because I obviously do still have a condition that has a very similar life impact to autism. But I would consider something like brain-scanning or DNA testing that might clarify a few things; even if they might change my current status. I would actually like to be a research volunteer, as I would definitely enjoy knowing more about how things work. And I like the idea of sharing experience.  Part of the reason for being somewhat blase about my diagnosis is that I am living totally out of the NHS system, and so do not have to worry at all about GPs and specialists who feel they want to put my medical records straight. So the thought that someone could live with self-identification alone is a completely acceptable one for me. I too debated not bothering with a diagnosis, though don't really regret it, but also know - even now - that I could live without it.

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