ADD Diary

Hi, a few weeks ago I had an ADHD assessment and it transpires that I have ADD as well as the autism. There is treatment for ADD and I wrote about how excited I was to be offered something which I anticipated to be a life-changing drug, I said that I would post regularly to talk about how it was affecting me, I am aware that I often have expectations of things which are rarely borne out with actual experience and I am sad to report that the same is true of the Lisdexamphetamine (30mg) I started taking yesterday. I can honestly say that I felt no noticeable difference.which was extremely disappointing as I was wiring up a slightly complicated electrical circuit of the type I have done enough times to be confident in my ability to do a safe job-I should add here that I check everything at least 30 times before I turn on the power! On this occasion however, my brain seems to have given up on me and although I had designed the circuit and cut all of the wires I got it into my head that there was a step I had not taken which was crucial but could not remember what it might have been. -I'll cut to the chase-my brain simply could not make sense of the wires and I had to disconnect it all and reconnect it  to check but I have lost confidence as well so I repeated the disconnect/reconnect cycle 3 times but am still not confident enough to turn on the power because my mind goes to mush whenever I try to plot it out in my mind-I have to be able to generate a picture of what I am attempting to comprehend on occasions such as this.

This is a situation where I thought the ADD Med's would come to my aid but no, I do feel deflated and foolish-not to mention extremely embarrassed and perplexed by my inability to complete the electrical work.

I have another appointment booked for the 14th of May so I'll see what alternatives there are, I am inclined not to take any more of the Lisdexamphetamine for now.

Parents
  • Hi I don't have any experience with ADD or that drug but I've just looked it up and it could take up to a month, were you advised to titrate up the dose or anything? 

    You say you only started yesterday so its really early days.

    I know what you mean about miracles though when I was first seen by psych I thought they would give me a magic pill to teach me how to communicate, I was 25 lol They did give me a pill but it was for depression and did nothing..... Even after weeks.

    Look up your drug in the BNF British national Formulary, you'll find loads more info on there.

  • Hi Bookworm,

    thanks for for supportive post, you are right to point out that it is still early to judge-I just imagined that being Amphetamine -based it would cut through all of the fuzz and crap in my head instantly-unreasonable expectations based on ignorance and wishful thinking-I've done that before!

    I'll give it time then try something else if it does not work. Take care and very best wishes to you.

  • Hi no probs. Yes it does say give it some time. The way the drug works is that when its metabolized that's when it starts to work, not all of the drug is metabolized so every time you take it you are effectively building up a reserve, apparently it doesn't work straight away and the way it's metabolized would explain this, I'd defo give it a couple of weeks taking the dose as prescribed and then if no effect contact the person that prescribed it.

    One thing I did notice is that you should never stop taking it abruptly, so if you do decide to continue giving it a go don't stop taking it without professional advice, and read all the literature you can on it.

    Hope it works out for you.

  • Hi Bookworm,

    hope you are well.

    I have not stopped taking the Lisdexamphetamine as I thought I might, I tend to be a bit hasty when it comes to dropping things which do not live up to my expectations immediately.

    I did not sleep well for the first few days and totally lost my appetite but everything is back to normal now.                    I have another appointment with the ADHD team on the 14th of May so I'll discuss what the options are-what I am looking for is less chaotic thinking because that screws up virtually every thing I do and it is not helped by my autism which makes my understanding of what other people are on about and any instructions they might give more than a bit hit and miss!

    Having come this far I am not going to give up looking for the right Med's for the job but I am aware that it may take some time but hell, I ain't got anything else planned.

    After a period when I'd "rested it" because I did not seem to be making any progress, but  just building up more frustration instead I have returned to my (slightly dusty!) piano and picked a piece of music to learn as a challenge-it's "Solveig's Song" from Peer Gynt.by Edvard Grieg-It's very pleasant on the piano but if it's goosepimples you are after, I'd listen on Youtube to a Norwegian Woman singing it-brings tears of joy to my eyes! Needless to say, the piece is way beyond my capabilities and there are parts of it which require a delicacy of touch which I do not think I can provide but I'll show it no mercy and in a month maybe, I could be able to play it all the way through in the manner of a Bull making its way through a China Shop from one end to the other and then maybe,in a year, I might let someone hear me-provided they are not anywhere in my eyeline and remain entirely silent. ( I made my youngest daughter leave the room when I played to her for the first time)I am still almost certain to mess it up once or twice no matter how hard I practice as i also get random twitches and jerks of my limbs-can be quite funny when I'm carrying liquids-and the concentration can disappear in the blink of an eye.The other difficulty I have is not being able to read through a score and play as I go along, I have to memorise every single note, one at a time-it takes forever but I cannot do it any other way.                                                                                                                                     The closest analogy I can come up with is this, imagine that you are reading a book or your emails and instead of seeing whole words and understanding what each assemblage of letters signifies your mind can only take in one letter at a time instead of whole words or complete sentences and you have to consciously register and be able to pronounce that letter before you can move to the next one and eventually form a recognisable word in your mind and get its meaning..It's very two-dimensional and a total drag..

    I need to get some food down me so I'll finish f here for now-very best wishes!

Reply
  • Hi Bookworm,

    hope you are well.

    I have not stopped taking the Lisdexamphetamine as I thought I might, I tend to be a bit hasty when it comes to dropping things which do not live up to my expectations immediately.

    I did not sleep well for the first few days and totally lost my appetite but everything is back to normal now.                    I have another appointment with the ADHD team on the 14th of May so I'll discuss what the options are-what I am looking for is less chaotic thinking because that screws up virtually every thing I do and it is not helped by my autism which makes my understanding of what other people are on about and any instructions they might give more than a bit hit and miss!

    Having come this far I am not going to give up looking for the right Med's for the job but I am aware that it may take some time but hell, I ain't got anything else planned.

    After a period when I'd "rested it" because I did not seem to be making any progress, but  just building up more frustration instead I have returned to my (slightly dusty!) piano and picked a piece of music to learn as a challenge-it's "Solveig's Song" from Peer Gynt.by Edvard Grieg-It's very pleasant on the piano but if it's goosepimples you are after, I'd listen on Youtube to a Norwegian Woman singing it-brings tears of joy to my eyes! Needless to say, the piece is way beyond my capabilities and there are parts of it which require a delicacy of touch which I do not think I can provide but I'll show it no mercy and in a month maybe, I could be able to play it all the way through in the manner of a Bull making its way through a China Shop from one end to the other and then maybe,in a year, I might let someone hear me-provided they are not anywhere in my eyeline and remain entirely silent. ( I made my youngest daughter leave the room when I played to her for the first time)I am still almost certain to mess it up once or twice no matter how hard I practice as i also get random twitches and jerks of my limbs-can be quite funny when I'm carrying liquids-and the concentration can disappear in the blink of an eye.The other difficulty I have is not being able to read through a score and play as I go along, I have to memorise every single note, one at a time-it takes forever but I cannot do it any other way.                                                                                                                                     The closest analogy I can come up with is this, imagine that you are reading a book or your emails and instead of seeing whole words and understanding what each assemblage of letters signifies your mind can only take in one letter at a time instead of whole words or complete sentences and you have to consciously register and be able to pronounce that letter before you can move to the next one and eventually form a recognisable word in your mind and get its meaning..It's very two-dimensional and a total drag..

    I need to get some food down me so I'll finish f here for now-very best wishes!

Children
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