NHS officially Diagnosed Autism Spectrum Disorder, already regretting it...

Hello everyone

I posted back in November about how difficult I was finding the assessment process. I kept at it really thniking it was a process of elimination and that I'd be diagnosed with something else. I remember being given a choice of whether or not I wanted to accept it, so felt if I was diagnosed I'd have that choice, but I didn't. The choice I was given was that I didn't need to tell anyone but that they had to tell my GP.

I've already - in a week - experienced direct discrimination when being brave and telling someone in a position of authority about my Autism. At the outset, this was my main concern with a diagnosis and being labelled was that it would mean anytime there was conflict between people it would always be the 'Autistic' who had the problem. I feel I've made a big mistake with the diagnosis, and at my age really, what was the point of one. I still fee the same, all this has done is made things more difficult as I feel less heard now than I did before.

I am utterly depressed and are considering having a life on the streets, as I cannot cope any longer with having to deal with people.....

Thanks for listening..

  • Thanks Robert123, I did that last night, in the dark, with only the sound of the wind in the trees, that's the only time I ever feel at peace...as soon as I return to the house I feel all the angst building up again...I don't even cope well with living in a conventional house....

  • I take a nice walk through the woods to relax and forget my troubles.

  • ...and what I mean by the streets is actually the woods,,,,,

  • Thanks for the reply candlewax...

  • I felt the same after my assessment in August.The first person I told denied totally that I am autistic, then I told my family - all of which have now totally disappeared and I have no contact. My kids all know and they are fine - as is my ex who already guessed anyway.

    Everything you have typed I relate to. It's a healing process - I am lucky to have had the support from my OH, my kids are fine and the ex has been great. I doubt I will be telling anyone else - as you say, its a conflict killer and there is an underlying feeling that the autistic guy is wrong because he's autistic and you need a lot of energy to fight that. 

    I have found comfort watching TED talks and looking at others experiences online. Things I thought were just me, or everyone had/did have opened my eyes. At the very least it's shown that almost every aspect of my condition and how it affects me aren't unique.