People keep touching me

Hi 

I'm newly diagnosed. I really hate it when people keep touching me, it makes me feel sick. Colleagues at work don't understand, yet I work in autism. I have had some stickers made up at quite an expense. Any other suggestions? 

Many thanks 

Kind Regards 

  • When you say autism report, do you mean diagnosis?

  • What I'd do personally is make a brief list of points that you feel that you are struggling with and approach your manager first. I'd try not to make it as if there is any area of blame. Unless someone is doing it intentionally there is no blame, just a little ignorance. Your colleagues might not mean you any harm, and you don't need any tension at work. I don't imagine that anyone is comfortable with causing you any distress, otherwise they wouldn't be working in autism. It's not 100% sure, but it's pretty unlikely.

    I have difficulty explaining some of my aversions, I usually use something like a fear of spiders, the dark, or something that might be relable to someone who doesn't have that aversion, but may have another. Fear of spiders, and fear of the dark is something I don't have myself, but I can relate to them because I think of the way I feel when I'm uncomfortable. Making something relatable can help people rationalise and understand your position.

    I know it's all a hassle, and in a perfect world we wouldn't have to explain these sorts of things. Try and be as polite as possible, explain the points as best you can, but make the point clear that you are struggling with touching. You can see it as spreading Autism Awareness in a way, you are making them aware of something that may be part and parcel of the daily ins and outs of their clients obstacles. All the best, and I hope you work it out with them. I can empathise completely, I think you can gather I'm not too tactile myself. Let me know how you get on if you like, I'm pretty hopeful you will be OK!

  • I see your point.

    If people know you don't like being touched and they are capable of other forms of communication such as speech.  Then touching can be considered a form of bullying and harassment.

    The disabled woman I referred to earlier was incapable of verbal communication.  So touching and grabbing was her way of saying hello or asking for help.

  • My manager has my Autism report but it is being ignored. 

  • My colleagues seem to have zero understanding of Autism. I find it difficult to explain why I don’t like it. 

  • I have submitted my Autism report to management, which states I don’t like to be touched but it is being ignored. I can tolerate the residebts doing it but it’s unfair when colleagues who know I don’t like it keep doing it. 

  • Hi, sorry I didn’t male myself very clear. It’s my colleagues that are causibg the issue. 

  • Touching in all it's forms, is a way of communicating.

    In my work with adults with challenging behaviour, one of my  disabled clients communicated often by physical contact.  She was both physically and mentally disabled, in a wheelchair, having Cerebral Palsy, epilepsy,  moderate learning disabilities and possibly autism.

    She didn't touch gently!   she grabbed people by their arm very strongly and kept a hold!  How one reacted to her strong grip influenced how she interacted with them.  She was very mobile in her wheelchair and often wheeled herself behind someone and either punched them or gave them a very strong kick.  I, because of my unorthodox behaviour never had any problems with her.  We got along very well.  Other staff members warned me to be on my guard. ' she punches, kicks, spits at people pulls people's hair and even bites' were some of  the warnings.

  • I can't stand being touched without context. I'm pretty friendly, but being mauled doesn't go down too well.

    In my teens, and early twenties, it was the cause of quite a few physical fights. I did have a little incident in a bar a while ago, but that was just someone getting knocked over.

    I usually tell someone politely, but sternly to get off. If they don't listen then I'll be a bit more nasty. It usually works. Better to be a bit of an *** than totally lose it.

    One thing I have found helpful is that treading on people's feet usually stops it. You can pass it off as being clumsy. People generally don't like their stuff being ruined.

    I'd just say in the context of where you work, just telling them straight should suffice. They will be familiar with the trait, it's not uncommon. I can't see there being a problem. Better to just get it out of the way, let people get used to it, and just not feel awkward. Think of it as making a polite request and not a demand. You'll feel better, it saves you the worry of snapping, and any conflict that may arise. People tend to understand something being expressed plain, and simple. The sticker thing is probably not a good idea, in my opinion, knowing how dickish some people can be, they might find it a bit odd. Best to just be straight, it's just a small thing, and considering where you work, it won't be a problem.

    I can't stand it when other men think a handshake is a mating dance ritual. It's quite cringey. I can't disguise the cringe!

    I wouldn't worry, and just tell a manager you like. All the best.

  • Sometimes I feel like Achmed The Dead Terrorist too.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V0niGzP5crs

    I hate social events with all the unpredictable hugging and kissing 'greetings'. Get off me!!!!!

    Some people are just more touchy-feely than others.

  • Usually I hate being touched but there are exceptions.

    I liked it when my cat touched noses with me.  And I enjoyed it  when she  rubbed necks with me.

    I like being tickled.

  • would something like a card on a lanyard be a bit more visible than a sticker maybe?