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Emotional links to animals and pets

dazahomestead

Long story short, I have a pet pig, yes that's right, a pet pig. We got her when she was 3 months old. We asked for permission, rented house, and were told 'there's no reason why not', by a member of the housing team. We loved our little girl, her name is Reu, short for Reuben, because she's a girl.

A few months passed then we had a follow up with regards to the request for permission for her. Well, here it all begins. Seems the person who had given the 'ok' was a junior that strangely no longer worked there. We most certainly could not house a pig at the property under any circumstances. Bit late at this point, seeing as how she had been living with us for a month or so.

The letter came ordering her rehoming, the fights on the phone, the emails. I tried to suggest it was a mistake on there behalf, quoting what we had been told in the beginning no luck. 

After months of hassle we found her a new home. It felt like my soul had been ripped clean away from me. I've always been attached to animals rather than people and I really took to this little girl with all my heart. I've always found it easier to relate to animals rather than people, at the time I had no idea that I could be on the spectrum.

We found out a couple of weeks after she left that the new owner's partner had, shall we say mistreated her. We were sick. We made arrangements to bring her back, informing the housing team of what had happened.

Time went on and we heard nothing. Piggy settled back in with us and we were all so relieved to have her home and our family felt complete again.

Months later a letter arrived. Final order to remove her or face eviction. I was so tired, so worn out from fighting this. I threatened to get a solictor involved.

Just a  year ago wife had a breakdown and was diagnosed with bipolar. It shock our family to the core at the time. So by this time I had nothing left in me.

Eventually my mum stepped in. She took piggy to live with them, which satisfied the housing team and meant we still could see her whenever we wanted, my parents live just the other side of town.

The one piece of good news, from my point of view anyway, and sorry if it seems vindictive, but the next time I spoke to the housing team I discovered that the person I had been dealing with was, mysteriously, no longer available and later we were told he 'no longer works for us'. Me threatening legal action got him the push because of the way he had dealt with it.

It still breaks my heart and is ever present in my mind that she's not her with us. It just reinforced my distrust and dislike of people as it was a person who forced my beloved pet away from me.

Now I understand what being on the spectrum can mean in terms of how i bond with people and animals, it makes sense but it still hurts me so deep.

Sorry, wasnt as short a story as I suggested at the beginning.

Parents

  • Hi,

    I'm sorry you, your family and your lovely pig Reu went through all that tragedy. I'm lucky to live in a house we bought, but I know rental owners can be so stupid sometimes. So long as you were looking after the place who really cares? There are some people who are far messier than pigs and ruin the homes they rent. My dad is a landlord, he does up houses and rents them out, and he's very fair. I just told him about this and he said he would have rented the house on the terms that he could see the property every month or two just to make sure it's still being kept well, which really, is all your landlords had to do.

    I think that's adorable that you had Reu. My Grandad used to have a pet pig, he loved him very much.

    I'm sorry that you're hurting now. I'm not surprised. Animals are like people, we become attached and they fill a special place in our hearts which just can't be replaced when they're taken away from us. I used to own a dog called Senna and she was gorgeous, she had the most golden fur imaginable, like the sun and was such a happy and warm dog. Always brought a smile to my face, even on the saddest days like when I lost my sister. Even through all that Senna could still make me smile, just by being there.

    I haven't told anyone this before. But last year an owner's dog attacked me when I was walking Senna, I have a scar on my right leg where it bit me - pain was excruciating!! Even when I was nearly dying in hospital with the flu wasn't as bad as that pain - and Senna jumped in and saved my life, sadly she sustained a nasty bite from the dog that bit me and that dog was put down, and so was Senna because her injuries were too severe to repair.

    Some people don't deserve animals because they don't give them enough love, care and attention. It's people like you who should have pets because you clearly love them and give them all the care and attention in the world! I miss Senna every day, just like I miss my sister, they were both a part of my world and I would give anything to have them both back in my life again.

    I'm so sorry about Reu, but I am glad she's still a part of your life. I'm sorry your landlords aren't more open minded about these things, Reu sounds totally adorable Heart eyes

  • in reply to Emma

    Thank  you. I read your story the other day. It's strange, because if I'm talking with NT people I find it hard to even care what they have to say, sorry if I sound cold, but thats the truth, but reading your post and what you've just said I actually 'felt' for you, I actually felt like I understood what you were trying to express and the deep cutting sadness that the empty hole that is left behind causes.

  • in reply to dazahomestead

    Thank you. Well you’ve been part way there, it doesn’t matter in what form, a loss is still a loss and it hurts like you’ve been stabbed and the wound never heals over. That’s how I feel every single day and sometimes expressing those emotions is so difficult. I ‘felt’ for you as well when reading your post, I could feel how hurt you were which is why I decided to tell you about Senna.

    The one good thing here is that at least Reu is still a part of you and your life. Do you see her often?

  • in reply to Emma

    Do you think there's more empathy between those on the spectrum than we can have for those not?

    I can't describe the feeling of lose too well either. We have lots a pets. At present we still have 12 chinchillas but we have lost 3 in the past 12 months. I go through the ritual of saying goodbye and burying them. I don't cry, I just can't understand why they are gone. We lost our oldest one this summer, he was 14 years old. There's a hole, a piece missing. Maybe it's a reflection of the fact I don't like change and that the truth is things can't last that way forever.

    I still see piggy a few times a week, take her for walks and talk to her. Still every time I have to say goodbye and leave her there until the next visit

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  • in reply to Emma

    Do you think there's more empathy between those on the spectrum than we can have for those not?

    I can't describe the feeling of lose too well either. We have lots a pets. At present we still have 12 chinchillas but we have lost 3 in the past 12 months. I go through the ritual of saying goodbye and burying them. I don't cry, I just can't understand why they are gone. We lost our oldest one this summer, he was 14 years old. There's a hole, a piece missing. Maybe it's a reflection of the fact I don't like change and that the truth is things can't last that way forever.

    I still see piggy a few times a week, take her for walks and talk to her. Still every time I have to say goodbye and leave her there until the next visit

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