To diagnose or not diagnose? That is the question

I have just completed the assessment process and I will find out the conclusion that has been reached this Friday.

I decided to try and get an autism diagnosis because I was getting tired of going round the same cycle of doing a job, getting on OK at first, then finding it hard, getting another job... I've got relatively little time left at work and I want to find ways of making it less stressful. I've recognised autistic traits in myself for some time.


My husband and I sometimes have ridiculous miscommunications and I get extremely upset if he moves items I have left piled up around the house. I think it may improve our relationship considerably if I find ways of organising my things better and he understands why moving stuff is so stressful for me. I think some of what causes me to be disorganised is due to executive disfunction and exhaustion from working very long hours.

The main factor holding me back was thinking about involving my parents. I now know the assessment could have gone ahead without their input but I thought it would provide s more complete picture if they were involved. In the end I got my sister to ask them and they were absolutely fine about it. They are very elderly and it has improved our relationship already - we can blame autism for some of the tensions between us! 

i've got several part-time jobs all with the same employer. I've got other conditions they know about and if I get a diagnosis I will almost certainly let them know. It would explain why I find certain aspects of my work so challenging. It would also be an opportunity to explore how I can make better use of my strengths. If I do get diagnosed myTrade Union rep is going to help me negotiate any adjustments I need at work. 

Another reason in favour of diagnosis is ensuring that any future decisions taken about me are done so with reference to autism. This is more of an issue for me now that I am close to 60 years old than it might have been in the past, although any of us could find ourselves in hospital at any time (I really don't think I could cope on a busy, noisy ward). 

Regardless of whether I satisfy DSM-5 criteria I am now convinced that I am autistic. Diagnostic criteria aren't objectively 'real' in any case, they change and evolve over time. The assessment process I have had is psycho-social not just medical. They have been looking at multiple dimensions of my life to understand how it has gone up until now. In follow-up sessions we'll be looking at adjustments I can make to help me to live more comfortably in future. I intend to do this even if I don't get an ASD diagnosis. 

There are risks associated with getting diagnosed - when I've mentioned the assessment to some people they slow down their speech and start using simpler language. Sometimes that's welcome but at other times it feels like I'm being talked to like a child. Another potential downside is the amount of emotional energy it takes to pull up things from the past and look at them again. The period immediately after diagnosis seems to be quite tricky to manage too, especially if help and support are not forthcoming. Adjustment can sometimes take a really long time. 

I am sure you will come to a decision that is right for you. 

Good luck whatever you decide!

I have just completed the assessment process and I will find out the conclusion that has been reached this Friday.

I decided to try and get an autism diagnosis because I was getting tired of going round the same cycle of doing a job, getting on OK at first, then finding it hard, getting another job... I've got relatively little time left at work and I want to find ways of making it less stressful. I've recognised autistic traits in myself for some time.


My husband and I sometimes have ridiculous miscommunications and I get extremely upset if he moves items I have left piled up around the house. I think it may improve our relationship considerably if I find ways of organising my things better and he understands why moving stuff is so stressful for me. I think some of what causes me to be disorganised is due to executive disfunction and exhaustion from working very long hours.

The main factor holding me back was thinking about involving my parents. I now know the assessment could have gone ahead without their input but I thought it would provide s more complete picture if they were involved. In the end I got my sister to ask them and they were absolutely fine about it. They are very elderly and it has improved our relationship already - we can blame autism for some of the tensions between us! 

i've got several part-time jobs all with the same employer. I've got other conditions they know about and if I get a diagnosis I will almost certainly let them know. It would explain why I find certain aspects of my work so challenging. It would also be an opportunity to explore how I can make better use of my strengths. If I do get diagnosed myTrade Union rep is going to help me negotiate any adjustments I need at work. 

Another reason in favour of diagnosis is ensuring that any future decisions taken about me are done so with reference to autism. This is more of an issue for me now that I am close to 60 years old than it might have been in the past, although any of us could find ourselves in hospital at any time (I really don't think I could cope on a busy, noisy ward). 

Regardless of whether I satisfy DSM-5 criteria I am now convinced that I am autistic. Diagnostic criteria aren't objectively 'real' in any case, they change and evolve over time. The assessment process I have had is psycho-social not just medical. They have been looking at multiple dimensions of my life to understand how it has gone up until now. In follow-up sessions we'll be looking at adjustments I can make to help me to live more comfortably in future. I intend to do this even if I don't get an ASD diagnosis. 

There are risks associated with getting diagnosed - when I've mentioned the assessment to some people they slow down their speech and start using simpler language. Sometimes that's welcome but at other times it feels like I'm being talked to like a child. Another potential downside is the amount of emotional energy it takes to pull up things from the past and look at them again. The period immediately after diagnosis seems to be quite tricky to manage too, especially if help and support are not forthcoming. Adjustment can sometimes take a really long time. 

I am sure you will come to a decision that is right for you. 

Good luck whatever you decide!

Thanks for your reply. From what I understand on other posts, you have had quite an in-depth assessment which has given you a greater understanding of yourself.

I hear what you are saying about miscommunications with your other half. I feel like me and my partner have had many miscommunications and that since i have been reading about ASC I can identify that this may be been a contributory factor. Since I have been reading I feel that I have a greater understanding of myself and we have come up against fewer of these "miscommunication" problems.

I'm not sure if I am bothered about raking things up from the past. Although I know I might underestimate this. Since I've been more ASC aware I can see how it fits with things which happened in my past or childhood. I've been lucky that I've had a good upbringing with a loving family although I did experience bullying etc when younger at school.