Am i aspergers? Or isit just another unfit diagnosis ?

Hi,

So ive been trailing this form for a while, and what i no off aspergers is all traits are different and i shouldnt believe the common mis interpretation of how all aspergers people are. I am waiting on the list to see if i may be. However, ive been on and off lists since i was 12. Ive had them diagnose me wih depression, anxiety disorder, bipolar but none of them really fitted. Ive been given councilling and cognitive behaviour therapy and neither has worked. Medication just makes me.worse. 

So this new diagnosis, could this ve me? I dont want to waste my time and others and i just want to no ehats up, so wondered if anyone could give me feedback.

Im not a brain box, i struggle especially currently at uni. Im not stupid i am quite clever in chosen subjects i feel interesting e.g. history, english, animals. Im very good at remembering facts which helps, i have a fact for most things especially animals as they are my fave interest and always have been. However even being somewhat clever, it never showrd in my school work till gcse as i was in the "stupid" classrs as i couldnt translate my brain to paper and it takes me a lot longer then others to get to the same part. Im aeful at maths, numbers get confused and muddeled in my head, i dont understand x tables at all and if you ask me a simple x or add question on the spot through mental.maths i cant do it.

Social wise as a child i would loxk myself in my room all day to play, i didnt really like to socalise and if i did it was games i wanted to.play and it had to make sense, it couldnt be completely made up and not be logical (which kids games are) i hates going to social events, i struggle to talk yo people about anything or connect. I always feel like i know them rather then beinf a friend and my friendships dont last long. 

I find i will get super tired. Brain fog and i cant concentrate on converstion, all noises blue into one.

I have bad anxiety and constantly worry, i cant stand being late it makes me panic, i hate plans being changed last second or things delayrd that stresses me. 

I have tantrums? Ill get over whelemd or so anxious i become either upset or agressive. I can be aggressive towards myself or others. Ecen just being tired can cause it, its quite extreme reaction to being tired. 

I dont lile being touched alot or in certain ways as i find it hurts or irritates me, im not big on affection. I like it when it suits me, but i dontlike someone in my personal space or to touch me without permission evem if its a hand on a shoulder and i hate this whole need to hug people when saying hello and goodbye.

My diet is twrrible, i only eat 5 things. I dont lile colourful food, food that has alot od taste, food with alot of texture, food that just doesnt make sense to me (soup) im also terrified of trying food and will completly freak out. 

However, i dont feel i have sensory issues with brightness or noise, some noises i dont lile and freak me out suxh as the washing machine, Hoover, drilling, trains. And im not in to organisation im acctually awfully messy.

Sorry for the long post, i could go on but ill stop there as i think thays the jist. 

  • Hi

    I have been diagnosed with Aspergers and ADHD and can relate to what you are saying.  It is not a case (like most things) that one size fits all, more a core of key characteristics such problems with socialising and understanding body language and nuances of other peoples behaviour and taking things literally.  

      I lost jobs because of not understanding what was expected of me and becoming aggressive when things went *** up.  

    The question to consider - what do you gain from a diagnosis and having a label?  I found some relief but the main thing was to get welfare as jobs were not possible.  I spend most of my life depressed and angry with everyone who has been successful in their lives.  I have more qualifications than most people but nothing else but have not lost my drive and determination to do something useful with my life.

    Being intelligent and articulate mean that I can get help with some things - on the other hand it is a double edged sword because it constantly makes you aware of how depressing life is when you cannot lead a life like other people.  Too many things irritate me but at least I have two dogs and a cat that give some unconditional love.

  • Not all people with ASD are the same. I've been on autism social media groups for a while now where people regularly put 'does anyone else have this symptom?' posts and people will pile on to give their experiences, many the same but not all. I can totally relate to nearly all of what you've written and it sounds very like autism to me.

  • I think personally you are an aspie.  Much of what you describe I also have and I suspect most people have.  But don't go into the diagnosis process expecting a piece of paper will suddenly change your life.  It won't.  Change comes from you.  The diagnosis is just someone confirming what you probably already know.  Yes from what I read you can get some concessions out of employers, maybe some extra benefits, so its not all neutral or negative.  But at the same time, anyone you tell will probably think of you as different and some people will treat you that way and it can kind of grind you down over time.

    People with ASD have lots of different issues.  Some are obsessive, some arent, some speak, some dont, and its like that with all traits.  Not everyone has all of them.

    So do what you think is best for you and also consider getting checked out for dyslexia (sometimes trouble with school work isnt being dumb, its just you dont quite get it the same way as everyone else).  All of my nieces and nephews have dyslexia on some level and 3 out 5 of my siblings have it.

  • Welcome to the forum, Nadielou.

    Well, I'm diagnosed with ASD (just a different name for Asperger's in my case), and you've described an awful lot of stuff there that is just the same as me; including the list of other diagnoses, and pills and therapy that didn't work. Living with autism can sometimes cause anxiety and depression, so even if those diagnoses are right, autism sounds like a likely explanation for why you might have them, given the other things that you said.  A few things are different for me; I'm better at maths, but I have worse sensory sensitivities, for example. But the social things, brain fog, anxiety, need for personal space, poor diet, and being very messy are just like me. Also, what you called "tantrums" sound a lot like what autistic folk call "melt-downs", too, and it's very common that they happen more easily when tired or stressed out.

    Of course, it's not for me to say for sure, but I've met a wide range of autistic people on-line over the last few years, and what you've said so far fits with Asperger's pretty well. More importantly, you've described some traits which many people here will recognise, so you should find the forum very useful to help you understand them and get some advice; even if it turns out not to be Asperger's you are very welcome here, and don't be afraid to ask about anything that makes you curious.