*deep breath*
Female, 40s, currently self-diagnosed but have submitted the AQ-10 with assistance of a counsellor. First counsellor I spoke to refused to refer me for assessment insisted that I couldn't be autistic as I 'demonstrate empathy and autistic people don't have empathy' - but this baffles me, especially as all I've seen on this forum is empathy! I've been told by an acquaintance that I don't seem to be empathetic but I think that's because of the issues I have with social interaction in general, as I find it easier to express myself in writing as I have more time and liberty to engage my thoughts and responses.
Ways in which I've been described since childhood -
awkward, introverted, weird, fussy, pedantic, highly strung, reserved, disengaged, detached, blunt, abrupt, cold, stress, set in my ways...
My school reports all state 'has intelligence / ability but lacks concentration and application.... daydreams... easily distracted..'
Have always been in employment (more or less same job with same company) but haven't moved up the ladder as, however good my productivity is rated, i'm told that my 'behaviours' aren't acceptable (though I am only given vague, if any, feedback on what these 'behaviours' are). Have been refused even a conversation wrt reasonable adjustments.
Can't maintain friendships or relationships; can't bear to be around people beyond the point where I'm 'done'.
There's more but my defective keyboard is driving me into a murderous rage!