Anxiety and Depression

How do people deal with anxiety and depression? 

I feel like my various traits make anxiety and depression worse and when I'm in a rut I don't look after myself properly. 

I want to move out but I don't feel that I can because of how bad my mental health gets. I've never had much support from family but I'm not sure how I'd survive on my own and I'm scared. 

I've had counselling several times but I'm sick of this cycle. I do meditation and mindfulness etc. & Currently avoiding the gym due to extreme anxiety. 

I was diagnosed as an adult so never had any support after diagnosis. I contacted the team who diagnosed me but never got a response. 

I don't have anyone to ring on my behalf or anything. I don't trust family due to the way they have treated me/others over the years

Im lucky enough to have a nice boyfriend but I'm scared he will leave me and then I'll be back to being alone. 

Any words of wisdom would be appreciated. For the first time in a while I'm asking for help but not getting anywhere and I'm just feeling like I've got no fight left. 

  • Sorry to hear you're in a bad way, midnightescape.

    I feel like my various traits make anxiety and depression worse and when I'm in a rut I don't look after myself properly. 

    This is true for me too, so I try to force myself to deal with the basic needs that I can, food and cleanliness, when I'm too low to do much else. It doesn't get me out of the rut, but maybe stops me sinking lower.

    I want to move out but I don't feel that I can because of how bad my mental health gets. I've never had much support from family but I'm not sure how I'd survive on my own and I'm scared.

    Have you tried it before? Would you have to move far from your family and other contacts? It sounds like you have no social work support, but could you contact social services with a need for supported housing? Could you ask for more help from your family?

    I was diagnosed as an adult so never had any support after diagnosis.

    It's sad that that statement makes so much sense to me. It shouldn't be a fact of life that autistic adults get no support. I'm still hoping things will change, and there may be things already available that we've yet to discover.

  • Hi midnightescape,

    You may like to contact our Autism Helpline team who can provide you with information and advice on support available in your area. You can contact the team via telephone on 0808 800 4104 (Monday to Thursday 10am to 4pm, Friday 9am to 3pm). Please note that the Helpline is experiencing a high volume of calls and it may take a couple of attempts before you get through to speak to an advisor. Alternatively, should you prefer to send a message, you can do so via their webform:

    https://www.autism.org.uk/services/helplines/main/questions.aspx

    Best wishes,

    Heather - Mod



  • Firstly, thank you for replying.

    Secondly, I'm only just getting round to replying because I haven't had access to a computer.

     I'm not really sure how to insert quotes. That's a good idea, I think I need to make a point of forcing myself to do the basic things when I'm low because I really struggle with that. I can't bring myself to do things even when I know I need to. 

    I have tried to move several times before but my family can be quite controlling and manipulative so they talked me out of it. They also convinced me that I wouldn't cope so now I've lost my confidence. I wish I'd done it though! I would actually like to move away from my family. Friends have been telling me to do so for years. I don't have social work support. I'm not sure I'd get any help because I work full time. 

    A friend of mine was in supported housing for a while and received HB but when he was working the rent was around £300 a week. I just couldn't afford that. 

    I've asked for help from my family several times. I've had mental health issues for years and unfortunately, I never get help. Even when I was having suicidal thoughts they left me to my own devices. If I try to ask for help it turns into an argument or them telling me all my flaws and calling me selfish. I understand it may seem selfish but sometimes it is very difficult to keep your head above water. 

    I work full time, study part time and yet I am expected to do fix others' problems, give them money, look after their children etc. because I'm very empathetic and it gets taken advantage of. 

    Yes it is a shame. I don't know many people with autism but it seems that adults don't get the support they need and in my opinion that's when they need support more. I've always known I was different but it was much easier to blend in as a child. However, as an adult, there are too many variables and pressures which make it so much more difficult and I think that's why I'm struggling a lot more as an adult. 

    Hopefully, it's a case of not knowing where to get support as opposed to there being no support.