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Avoiding looking at yourself in mirrors

Cassandro

Another thread asking 'is this an autistic thing?'

I've noticed I avoid catching sight of my reflection in bathroom cabinets, hallway mirrors and so on. It occurs to me that the sense is almost one of embarrassment, and may be similar to my problems connecting with other people and my general reluctance to make eye contact. When I'm in my inner world, is another human being too much even if it's myself?

I'm pretty sure it's not just worry about my appearance or ageing. I recall a big group at school when I was about 15 (at what might be PHSE nowadays), and a teacher asked for a show of hands by who had looked in the mirror that morning. They were teenagers. Of course they were concerned to look their best. I think I was the only one who hadn't, and didn't usually. I don't worry about appearance most of the time – I might look if in a fitting room, or glance in a car window if going to an event where I'm in front of people, and do have to shave occasionally but am still uncomfortable and don't look at my overall appearance. Almost literally scared of my own shadow.

There was some mention of this from a few people here: last month and a year ago. Kind of relate to 'a lot of other people with similar issues with mirrors'.

So here's the poll. Just a bit of fun, I hope.

Clarification after what Pirate Santa said: 'don't like eye contact' means either you probably don't keep eye contact as much as a typical person, or there are some circumstances, eg meetings with strangers, when you will usually be looking away, or inclined to look away, from people. There are times when I am interested in looking at someone, but it's far from my usual mode of being.

Parents

  • Seeing this topic made me grin - I've always had a bit of a "thing" about mirrors.

    When I see myself in a mirror, my whole body-mind thing can go utterly wonky. My proprioception is pretty bad generally, and I quite often lose track of where limbs are, and I am prone to dissociating.  When I look in a mirror there is a strange sense of not quite knowing whether "me" is my body or the reflection. I don't mean that to sound frightening or melodramatic - I actually find it rather amusing. This is why I have nearly always had a beard; trying to coordinate my movements by watching my reflection is like something out of a slapstick comedy.

    When I was a child, I had quite a few accidents involving mirrors; it took me a long time to work out that the "other kid" who looked so excited to see me wasn't going to get out of the way when I ran at him (thankfully, I was never seriously hurt.) It's also part of the reason that I don't drive; I simply can't use the mirrors properly because it takes me too long to figure out anything more than "behind me somewhere?".

    The weird thing is that I understand the optical science of mirrors very well, and I'm good enough at geometry to have worked as a draughtsman; but I just can't quite get my head around them.

    Another thing that might be connected is that I can't stand pictures of faces looking straight out of the page. If there's one on the page of a magazine or newspaper, I often have to cover it up, otherwise it gets really distracting. I can't quite describe the sensation it gives me; again, it's not frightening, and I know full well that the picture can't see me, but it makes me feel odd in a very distracting way.

    I LOVE halls of mirrors, though; I could spend all day in hysterics in one of those.

  • in reply to Trogluddite

    There's quite a lot in this reply that corresponds with my experience.

    It's strange that I think the person I see in the mirror is different to the one I see in a photograph (I've even tried flipping the photo to produce the "mirror" image).  I've done physics and been a draughtsman but still don't get them - like you say.

    But what did freak me out on more than a few occasions were seeing passengers sitting outside the train window.  Sometimes, when the light is right combined with the angle of the carriage you get a perfect reflection of passengers in the window floating serenely and unconcerned in mid air!

    I did manage to pass my driving licence but only after a few fails where one of the key points was lack of using the mirrors. 

Reply
  • in reply to Trogluddite

    There's quite a lot in this reply that corresponds with my experience.

    It's strange that I think the person I see in the mirror is different to the one I see in a photograph (I've even tried flipping the photo to produce the "mirror" image).  I've done physics and been a draughtsman but still don't get them - like you say.

    But what did freak me out on more than a few occasions were seeing passengers sitting outside the train window.  Sometimes, when the light is right combined with the angle of the carriage you get a perfect reflection of passengers in the window floating serenely and unconcerned in mid air!

    I did manage to pass my driving licence but only after a few fails where one of the key points was lack of using the mirrors. 

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