Often when I speak to medical professionals about my views on death they are very surprised and exclaim ‘you are very black and white about that.’ I realise my views on the subject differ to that of many other people, and they have done since I was a young child. I don’t know if this is partly due to my autism, or just my own weird take on things, so I thought I’d ask on here what other people’s views on death/dying are. To give you a flavour of my views, here are some of my comments on the matter:
I think that we all die so we should get used to the idea sooner rather than later and that’s it’s not worth worrying about as it is inevitable. I wouldn’t care if I died tomorrow. Further, if I was to fall terminally ill I would refuse treatment as I believe in letting nature take it’s course - after all, natural selection has worked well for thousands of years, so why mess with it? If I died prematurely due to illness I would just see it that this was meant to be. This is why, despite being in my early 20s, I have already requested a do not resuscitate to be in place (also, I kind of view CPR as a form of physical assault - having seen it done to others, I certainly wouldn’t want it done to me!) and I said I wouldn’t want a blood transfusion when I had surgery. Don’t get me wrong, I am not one to refuse all medical input and I am very thankful for some of it, but I do draw a distinct line between what I consider acceptable and not.
My grandma is currently in a nursing home with dementia. She literally asked my mum and me to smother her, and she just wants to die because she is no longer able to live at home and do what she enjoyed. The home said she was depressed and tried to medicate her for it. They gave her a medication they new would increase her appetite as she was refusing food. I ended up arguing with them over it, explaining that my grandma wasn’t mentally ill - her thinking was perfectly logical and if I was in her position I would feel the same way. My grandma is very like me, and is very pragmatic about death also, and she hid the tablets rather than taking them, so that demonstrates what she thought about it! Maybe I was wrong to argue with the home, but I honestly couldn’t understand why they were trying to get her to feel different and eat more, as this would only prolong her suffering (aka life) and she just wanted to die! I think that keeping people alive at all cost is truly immoral and if they didn’t ask for it personally, it is selfish of those who did.
Disclaimer: I don’t mean to offend anyone with my views, and I certainly don’t expect others to comply with them. I respect everyone’s views and I know this is a difficult subject for some. I’m just wondering if anyone else thinks like me about death, or if I’m being obscure on my own here! Some may put it down to my current depression, but as mentioned I’ve thought like this from a very young age, so it appears intrinsic (maybe inherited from my grandma!).
A few thoughts of my own...
Regarding the physical procesd of death...it happens to everyone so why worry about it. i believe our bodies compensate and flood us with feel-good chemicals near the end. So far i feel ive had a good life. I dont think i want for much. Im contented and happy. Im extremely grateful for family, friends, my job, mysic, art, nature. I feel i have no regrets as ive slways just got on with whatever situation im in.
Im petrified of losing my parents.
I lost my grandma last year. I was with her very near the end. Dememtia along with other problems. It was awful to see her deteriorate. At the time i thought we keep ppl alive longer than they should be. Now im not sure...she fought to the very end and the nurses did a wonderful job. My friend's mum has early onset dementia. He wants every last moment with her because she is relatively young.
I dont believe in an afterlife as such. I dont know if consciousness survives. Ive been dipping in and out of quantum physics for thr past few years trying to find out.
But what happens before we are born then? At what point do we become conscious beings?
Im interested in these people (children) who know things from a past life they couldnt possibly know. There was something on Really TV about this.
I think we are quite sqeamish about death. Have you seen Dark Tourism on Netflix? Theres a country - might be in South America, where they dig members of the dead up every year and decorate them with clothed and jewellery and give gifts.
Ive also wondered before now the body and mind processes and reacts upon different modes of death. E.g instant death by bullet or slower process through illness