Are there any women here?

Hi im a female im 29 n from the uk

Hi I'm female newish here. Ive replied to a couple of blogs and even asked a question but then have no clue how to get back to find thread or replies,  so apologies in advance if you never hear from me again.  I have a 13 year old with Aspergers and going down that long diagnosis with him was like an awakening that I've got ASD too! Now considering asking for a diagnosis too, would seriously save me having to put the nt face on every day at work, so exhausting.

I'm fascinated about the "put the NT face on every day at work". It brings back memories from before my burn out, when I used to work. Do you work full time? It must be hard combining it with childcare?

When I look back I like had trouble with like feeling I had to smile at everyone and always say hello every time you cross someone in a corridor (actually when you observe NT's I think there are unwritten rules (I read it somewhere in a book about ASD too)  that you only have to smile and say good morning the first time you see them and afterwards you don't need to greet them)? But how do you cross someone in a corridor and not smile if you know they have seen you? Also as a teacher, I struggled because I felt I had to keep everyone happy and engaged all the time and was very sensitive to students' reactions.

I also got frightened because there are some faces of people I saw less frequently (like higher bosses) I couldn't quite remember their faces and functions and I would avoid having to walk through their corridors because I was worried I would not recognise and appropriately greet (whatever appropriate is supposed to mean). It was only during and after my burn out that I also realised that things like the confusing lay-out of building, claustrophobia, windows not opening, too much glass and stimuli and constantly changing rota and rooms etc were crazy even for an NT. 

In a sense I think many people would benefit from adjustments to work to accommodate for ASD tendencies. Unfortunately for me when I tried to return to my job, the work physician said, oh well you don't want to make this official, just ask your boss for these things. And unfortunately the boss after a month said, well this has taken long enough, it is time to pull your weight again and stripped me from my "entitlements".

From your post I make up that if you had a diagnosis you would consider telling your boss you have an ASD? Some people advise against it, some people are pro. I just don't know what I'd do in a future workplace.  Basically, it is discrimination if your needs aren't taken into account. On the other hand there is so much prejudice and misunderstanding- with the "oh you don't look it, don't let them stick a label on you, you are fine the way you are", through "we are all a little autistic" to being given the feeling that you are less because of the diagnosis. 

People can be uncomfortable with silence... more talking means less thinking and self reflection... it is also a craving to belong to the herd... I guess we felt we never belonged so don’t have that anxiety so much???

Well said! It is good to see so many women here and all supporting each other x

Well said! It is good to see so many women here and all supporting each other x