Published on 12, July, 2020
I feel like I'm the only one!! Life is hard, I get stressed, I have severe anxiety and many phobias, as well as a degree of OCD. But I'm not depressed and my mood is mostly stable. I have had meltdowns (we just called them tantrums back in the day), but they blew over and I recovered quickly. I just follow my routine and interests and keep on an even keel. I don't work, which probably helps, and am single. I was diagnosed before my sense of difference really hit me, and I was late to develop awareness, or really care about being different.
I receive a lot of support, which helps.
Hi Hope
I would say that I've never been depressed. I have occasionally been asked by others if I think I am depressed but having familiarised myself with the symptoms of depression I would say that I don't identify with it. So no I would not say I have been depressed.
However, I have had severe anxiety with panic attacks, phobias, OCD. I was at some point diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder. I have since noticed that some of the 'lists' for things to look out for misdiagnosed Aspergers is a previous diagnosis of generalised anxiety disorder. So with my 'aspie epiphany' that made a lot of sense.
I was offered meds for anxiety but I have always been sensitive to meds, have trouble with side effects and had to stop taking them. So I went for CBT but that seemed to just make me worse. Then I was signed off from the adult mental health services for no reason other than they didn't know what to do with me. I eventually had to resign from work instead as I had become too anxious to continue working there!
I think our feelings can manifest in different ways. Some people will be depressed, some will be anxious, some will have a mixture of both, etc etc.
So, no you're not the only one. Everyone on here will have backgrounds with some similarities and some differences. Though the same could be said of the whole population as no one person has the same mix of experiences.
Just to pick up on the CBT: I did nine months individual psychotherapy followed by 2.5 years of group therapy some 10-15 years ago. When asked at my diagnosis what I had got out of psychotherapy I was unable to ascertain anything concrete other than I attended religiously and enjoyed going. I have since carefully thought about the psychotherapy and I would evaluate it as indeed having been useful for giving me a weekly routine, beyond that I cannot evaluate whether it was of psychological benefit or not. I just liked going there.