So, here’s my deal. I’ll try and be as clear and concise as possible, I am better in short bursts of words and never was any good at English, and much better at expressing myself visually.
Anyway… I had another meltdown on FB the other week.
Decided it would be great to maybe meet women as I’d moved to a new area and needed a distraction from all the work I’m having done to my flat.
So boy meet girl on Tinder, go on a date, boy thinks it’s gone ok, girl says the same in person. Boy contacts girl day after, girl doesn’t engage back in conversation, boy feels rejected (which tbh, I have been).
In my quest for answers, the more I think back to that date, and also many other dates I’ve had, I just can not read situations at all. that then leads to frustration and anger at letting myself be put in a vulnerable position, doing something which I know I just can’t do.
On the outside, people think I’ve got it all. and have nothing to be ‘depressed’ about. home, career, interests and all that other materialistic stuff. But they don’t understand how frustrating it is, not to be able to read other peoples body language, and basically be in a position to have a potential relationship (been single 3 yrs since the last one of 5yrs, and tbh, life is getting a quite lonely).
I compare it with job hunting. I’m quite crap at that too. too open, too honest, ramble on about stuff which i shouldn’t be rambling on about, and on paper I’m as qualified as anyone with the same level of portfolio.
Probably should take my own advice on being up front with any potential date that I am on the spectrum, then maybe then, they might not view me as rude/weird or whatever it is that I’ve said thats probably made them run a mile…
Just wanted to put it out there and see if anyone else has had similar feelings (or lack of).
thx
