Pet Hate Adoption Service

I will take the hugging greeting and the kissing on each cheek, although my extended family is Dutch, so it's 3 air kisses

I'll take Traffic cones and the 'connected - no internet'

For me both of those are useful things that can lead me to make different decisions

I'm not taking any of your adoptee's, although if you include things like Bake Off as rality tv then I'll take some, I like watching real people doing real things, but the likes of love island I can't stand.

I get inanimate objects ganging up on me too, and I'm sure I've nearly dislocated my wrists trying to undo some jars, marmite jars are among the worst, I seem to get half way down the jar and then it dosen't want me to have the other half!

The hugging thing is horrible, before even shaking hands I have to think to myself, “you’ve got this.” I’m also trying not the cringe at the same time.

Don't get me started on the kissing on each cheek greeting. There is normally about one metre of space around me, no one else needs to enter it.

All reality TV.

Jars or bottles with the lids ‘welded’ on.

Furniture that bullies me by walking into me.

I’ll take on the biscuits in coffee! Even though I barely drink coffee since it makes me a bit drowsy, I love to have a biscuit for dunking whenever I have one anyway.

1. Dunking biscuits in coffee - should be a criminal offence

2. Trying to connect your laptop to WiFi and it says 'Connected - no internet' - well what's the point of that then?

3. Traffic cones, especially when they appear to have been placed for no apparent reason

Clutter definitely needs to be consigned to oblivion!

This thread reminds me of that TV series called "room 101" where guests put forward things they hated and the host decided if they were bad enough to be consigned to oblivion in a fictional room 101.

I just looked through a list of things they tried to get into room 101 on that programme, and the 3 that I thought should have gone in were:

Clutter

Shoelaces

Fake tan

I can rarely find any that fit me and shoe shopping is a fraught experience that often leaves me in tears, I like the click of high heels on hard ground, I wouldn't want to wear them all the time, but I would like to have more and better shoe options available to me. A lot of shoes aren't remodelled for larger feet and they can look like I've got a pair of cattle barges on my feet, it's similar with many other clothes they just add an extra couple of inches on the length without adjusting darts and things like that.

TheCatWoman said:

I'd love to have a better relationship with shoes.

How do you have a relationship with shoes? 

I just can't abide high heels - they hurt your feet, they give you a bad back, they make a horrid clicky  noise on hard floors, they sink into soft ground - they should be put in shoe prison! Perhaps you would visit them, cat woman?.

I'm not a fan of the beatles either, I don't doubt their contribution to modern music, I just don't want to listen to it.

I'd love to take you high heeled shoes, except they'd probably give me vertigo as well as putting me well over 6 foot in height. I'd love to have a better relationship with shoes.

O&U Do you mean piccalilli?

My pet hates include drivers hogging the overtaking lane when not overtaking or turning right. 
Phones on speaker mode during conversations/music playing without use of headphones or ear buds.                                                                Dog poo and litter on pavements and other outdoor public spaces.

I’ll adopt smiley emojis, sad emojis, laughing emojis, thumb’s up emojis and the wish/pray emoji. Forget the rest.

 TheCatWoman I’ll take the emojis. I started using them when chatting on a messenger with people I don’t know too well because some told me that my texts sometimes seem passive aggressive. It’s an easy way to avoid misunderstandings with those crazy people who interpret a period at the of a sentence as a passive aggressive hint.

I put hugging goodbye or hello up for adoption. Don’t get me wrong, I get the idea of showing affection, but handshakes are already enough torture for me, I don’t need to be touched all the time, especially in the summer when hugging usually involves skin to skin contact due to short-sleeved clothing. No thanks.

I tried to think of things I hate that others like, so they might be "adopted":

The Beatles (the band, not the bugs)

Mustard

High heeled shoes

Any takers?

FS, you can take the tightly wrapped parcels, but I'm afraid I can't relieve you of of slow walkers, they annoy me too, especially those groups that plod along like an ambulatory picket line. Links to social media annoy me too.

Oooh, I'll have BBQs. I love having them mainly because I like fire, but can't because I live in a flat.

My biggest pet hate is needy people at work. The sort who want constant reassurance, compliments, feedback on everything and loads of contact. They can't go a few days without an interaction of some sort as they assume you must be annoyed or upset with them if you don't send a stream of messages and emails. They expect you to waste work time asking about personal stuff they insisted on telling you about last time and the worst bit is you have to not only put up with it, but play up to it, pretending you enjoy all this pointless, mindless contact. It's exhausting.

Yes, I do have individuals in mind!

Edit: also hotels that have a turn down service and try to get into the room when you're already sat in bed watching tv

I will adopt the tightly packaged parcels and presents. I enjoy a process when opening things

I will put up for adoption: people walking slowly (I am a fast walker and I get frustrated with slow walkers) and public use of links to social media platforms that then don't let you see it unless you have an account.