Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello everyone my name is Rose and I am 58 years old. My hobbies are Twitter, gardening, classic cars, art, photography and spending time with my dog.
Recently I became very stressed when my beloved 12 year old dog was dying of heart disease and things were incredibly hard for me at work. Things have always been very challenging at work, I always end up in conflict with colleagues or managers, but as I get older it is more difficult to keep finding new jobs. This has finally led to me seeking an autism diagnosis after years of wondering if I am autistic.
I had my first meeting with a psychologist for my autism assessment last week. I was amazed at how much we talked about in that hour and a half. So many things from my childhood and adult life are starting to make sense. Lots of 'what ifs' and 'if onlys' started going through my mind but I am trying not to feel regret. I phoned my younger sister afterwards and she said she has thought for years that I am autistic (she thinks my Dad is autisitc too).
After my Norfolk Terrier died I realised that I could not cope without a dog as a best friend. A week later my husband and I adopted a Border Terrier who had been used for breeding and was not wanted now she cannot have any more puppies. She was very nervous when she first arrived but she is beginning to trust us (see photo below). I badly injured my ankle going on too many dog walks, so I am off work at present. In a way this is a good thing as it has removed me from a very stressful work situation. It has also given me time to think about the autism assessment process.
Finding this online community and reading some of the discussion threads has been incredibly helpful. It's wonderful to be among people who have had similar experiences.
Sunflower said:One of the best things we ever did was a trip on the Waverley paddle steamer - the last sea going one in the world.
I have been 'waiting' to go on the Waverley for the past three years. I booked to go to Lundy Island from Penarth in 2016, the trip was cancelled due to weather.
Then in 2017, it was cancelled because the boat had a little accident in Scotland and was laid up. This year I was too late, all the tickets had been sold. So next year, on a beautiful calm, sunny and warm September day I will look forward to making the trip. Over forty years since I went to Lundy which was on the Balmoral (not a paddle steamer).
The last paddle steamer I went on was the Maid of the Loch along Loch Lomond in 1977, one of the last years of its service under Caledonian MacBrayne, the largest inland lake steamer in Britain and the last paddle steamer built in Britain. It is now being restored to steam again so I look forward to another trip on it in a few years time.
Visiting Bradford Industrial Museum is an excellent suggestion, thank you. As you say it is marvellous when you get to hear people who are enthusiasts talking about the machines.
I've added a drive in a Jowett Jupiter to my wish list. They are such elegant cars as well as having incredible performance capability. So sad that the firm did not survive it would have been interesting to see what they produced next.
I did not even know there was such a thing as a boat lift - off to Google it now! Thanks for reminding me about Jodrell Bank too. None of these places are too far from where we live, and it would make a good campervan trip.
If you come out this way, the Bradford Industrial Museum is well worth a visit; they have a good collection of old industrial machinery (a lot from the former textile mills), engines, and classic vehicles. There are certain hours when they have people in to run the machines, and if you can get a moment with them, they're fascinating people to talk to.
It's a shame that Jowett came to such an ignominious end so prematurely. Their cars had a fine reputation at the time, not least the Jupiter's stunning performances at Le Mans, and they'd already invested a lot in trying to make themselves more self-sufficient.
You've reminded me that I need to badger an old friend from Cheshire; he's been promising me a visit to the Anderson boat-lift and Jodrell Bank for quite a while now!
Don't get me started on office politics and game playing. That's why I prefer field work.
One of mine has been k own to fish chicken legs out of my soup, as it is cooking
Until recently I wanted to work indefinitely - I'm hoping my enthusiasm will return. I love working with the people I provide a service for, but the office politics, game playing and miscommunication exhaust me.
Early starts aren't good either!
When we had both a dog and a cat I loved the way they worked as a team to steal food from the kitchen! The cat was more agile and the dog was the brains of the outfit!
Hello lovely to meet you. It is really lucky that our little dog likes cars - we had no idea if she would when we adopted her. I think she associates being in the car with a nice walk somewhere. How wonderful that the photo reminded you of your Grandad's terrier and his Hillman Avenger.
I'm glad you mentioned the annual Jowett get together - we're not far away so we might try and go next year. I have always admired Jupiters and Javelins and I like them even more after finding out via Google that Jowett was a stubbornly independent car manufacturer based in Idle!
One of the best things we ever did was a trip on the Waverley paddle steamer - the last sea going one in the world. The engine room was incredible. I also love visiting the beam steam engines at Ryhope near Sunderland. Watching them work is mesmerising and it's a lovely place to warm up on a cold day!
Thank you so much for welcoming me.
Thank you so much for the () and the car chat. You are lucky to have known people who have tractors. We had some in the grounds of my nursery school and I spent hours sitting on them. There is a vintage tractor club in our village and we see them out on runs sometimes, annoying impatient drivers but giving great joy to people like me! Being able to get parts and do repairs is one of the merits of the Morris Minor. They don't have the off road capabilities of the Land Rover but a Morris Minor belonging to the Archbishop of Canterbury did very well on a 1980 Himalayan Rally! The little dog is snoozing next to me. She has the loveliest snore. I am going to try and record it on my phone so I can play it back at stressful moments. Take care.
Welcome, Rose.
What a wonderful picture. It instantly reminded me of my Grandad's terrier sitting on his knee in his old Hillman Avenger when I was a kid! I'm also rather partial to classic car rallies, steam fairs and transport museums; I don't get to as many as I'd like as I don't drive myself, but it's always something I check out if I stumble across one, and I always try to go to the annual Jowett get together in nearby Bradford (I'm very partial to Jowett Jupiters!)
Crafty little kitty!
Oh I don't mind continuing to work, I just don't want to work the way I used to. My flat is paid for not writing, which is a massive thing really, it does mean I can say no to early appointments more often, still hate the uncertainty of being freelance though
You are right about it being difficult to leave pets when going on holiday. We used to have a cat as well as a dog. He was outdoors a lot so we didn't have to get anyone to look after him when we were at work. When we went on holiday the neighbour would come and feed him. When we got home the cat would sit on one of our laps and refuse to move for several hours. Once we nearly took him away in the campervan by mistake - my husband saw the tip of his tail poking out of the overhead storage compartment just before we set off for Ireland! I think it is a real shame retirement ages have been pushed back. Lots of people around my age are ready to retire.
Yes, retirement is a tempting idea for me too. Do you have any cats? Not sure they are any less a tie, especially when we it is time to make a trip away. I hate leaving them.
I certainly do remember bubble cars, car shows are relaxed and as everyone there is by nature into cars it is easy to talk about them, a common interest allows conversation. No struggles to create chit chat.
my work friend and his wife both owned tractors and did many tractor runs,
I always fancied a land river as they are totally replaceable, by which I mean everything can easily be changed if the need arises, very sturdy and reliable, go anywhere too.
I am glad you both share the interests so much. Enjoy your new family member and she will give back the love you give her, clever things dogs, they sense real people. And give unconditionally..
take care, oh and this is known as an aspie hug (), it is a virtual one so no fretting to give it,,,, its yours if you want it,,,
Do you remember bubble cars in the 1960s? Together with Morris Minors they were quite common where I grew up. There's a wonderful micro car museum in Lincolnshire where you can see them. We went on a drive out there when we owned a Fiat 126 which Stirling Moss said was the car he had the most fun driving. Older Volvo estates are lovely too! Built so well and lovely solid shapes. I think classic car shows combine lots of good elements. Conversation is easier for me with something technical to focus on and nobody minds if you just walk round and look. I like being out in the fresh air and we usually take a picnic. Best of all they are nearly always dog friendly! I really want to own a classic tractor one day, but I am struggling to persuade my husband that this idea is practical. He might agree to let me get a jeep or Landrover eventually as we live up north and sometimes get snowed in.
I was born 1962 so your moggie was a common sight fie me, cars had character then,,,oh and often lots of rusty holes and oil leaks, Lol. All part of the charm,
I own older Volvo estates, also attend classic car shows, well not often, but enjoy them when I do.
Hi there thanks for your message. I adore cats too and often think they are more calming than dogs. Certainly more independent - a dog is a big tie when working for example. I understand what you mean about genuine self employment. I have 5 x part time jobs at the moment 3 of which are casual contracts - thought I'd feel less pressure but there's still lots of hassle! Wish I could fast forward 6 years and retire. I never get bored at home.
Hi nice to meet you.
You are so right about pets being members of the family - some people understand that, others seem to think losing a pet is like letting go of a piece of furniture. To me dogs have full personhood!
With hindsight it's all very obvious that I am autistic but when I was growing up in the 1960s and 1970s awareness was far from where it is now (and there's still such a long way to go).
Morris Minors are lovely little cars - mine is 1962 same year as my sister. Lots of nice details like the centre of the steering wheel and wheel hubs. Classic car shows are a complete Nerd Fest for me!
Our new family member is such a sweet little dog. There were years of neglect when she was being bred from, so there are challenges to overcome. However, love radiates from her and she sits on me like a weighted lap blanket calming me down.
Thanks so much for welcoming me to the community.
Hi Rose
I am 59 and am more into cats, I have two. No ongoing assessments for me, just trying to be more genuinely self employed when if a cub contractee, you are still treated very much like an employee.
Nice looking dog, anyway.