What is Autism exactly?

There are a number of variables in the equation. My understanding is that LFA implies low intellectual ability (or IQ) and HFA means high intellectual ability.

As I understand it - you can have a mild form of Autism - if you score just enough points on whatever test you do to be classed as autistic. E.g. you understand a bit of banter but often miss the point of jokes, you have one or two friends, you can remain employed but keep getting into arguments at work, you have a chequered work history. You can get into relationships but it might not last. You were bullied at school but don't feel threatened or bullied much now.

Severe autism would then mean that you score very badly on a test so you score all  questions in the autistic manner. E.g. you are baffled by all facial expressions and things like sarcasm etc, you have NO friends, are unable to get a job or to keep one, you get into arguments in shops on a regular basis. You get bullied and harassed by neighbours or strangers perhaps because you don't know how to blend in and become anonymous.

Now there is a real complication to add to this. If you have a mild but manageable form of autism but then keep hitting "brick walls" in your social interactions and repeatedly have to start over on almost everything you do then you will get stressed and clinically depressed. You might easily convince yourself that life is hopeless, you end up with no friends and you talk yourself down with negative talk every day as the things that go wrong are more obvious to you than the things that go right. In some cases the resulting mental illness appears as bipolar disorder or other condition. In this state of mind you might appear to have a more severe, disabling form of autism than you really have.

In hindsight, I would say that I am mildly affected.

Before the diagnosis, I repeatedly got into bad social situations, I misunderstood people and they misunderstood me. i kept failing to spot what other people would do when I said things and did things. I got stressed and really depressed - I became completely unproductive at work and at home, I couldn't seem to do anything right and the world seemed to be against me. People kept asking me what was wrong because I looked miserable. In short, I recognise this as real clinical depression. It became a completely negative spiral and I was well on the road to being sacked.

Now that I have the diagnosis, and my work colleagues and bosses are beginning to understand what it means, I am able to get things done, give extra effort to thinking things over with extra care and trying to imagine things from the others' point of view. I still get it wrong and its a real struggle sometimes but it's like having the old 'me' back.

But surely there is no such thing as 'mild' or 'severe' autism? I don't think you can accurately compare so called 'Low Functioning' Autism with 'High Functioning' Autism, because they are very different sub-groups. Yes, the support needed can differ massively, and the challenges faced can be quite different. But it is no more accurate or true to say that one type of Autism is more severe than another, than it is to say that Schizophrenia is more severe than Bipolar. I consider myself to be severely affected by Autism, yet my difficulties are completely different to those of a Low Functioning Autistic person; I can speak, feed myself, go out alone, and converse with people, all things that many Low Functioning Autistic persons will never attain. And yet, I can't maintain a full time job, require a lot of support from parents and support workers, and am friendless, and potentially isolated. Autism (the Asperger variant) stops me living a full and independent life.

I know other people with Asperger's who do manage work, relationships, and other markers of independence. Their struggles are probably quite different to mine, but the difficulties faced might be just as severe, and they might still face a lot of stress.

A disability does not have to be official, as in eligibility for social benefits and support. Arguably all people with Asperger's are disabled because the social disadvantage can put them in vulnerable situations. The disability is certaintly context specific, meaning that Asperger's is sometimes not experienced as a disability. But if the environment were to change, then the disabling features will become too apparent. Many people first get diagnosed when they become aware of their disability. In any case, Asperger's has to cause clinically significant impairment for it to be diagnosed in the first place.

Higher IQ isn't strictly accurate. A proportion may be above average, very few significantly above. Many, including those affected by comorbid learning disability will be below.

Diagnosis concentrates on the Triad of Impairments, a set of criteria used to distinguish autism from other conditions. The tragedy is that the professionals then go on to use the triad to define living with autism. The triad overlooks many things not considered crucial to diagnosis (for some bizarre reason), particularly environmental sensitivity and sensory overload.

The dilemma for the original poster is a common one. Just because you don't manifest textbook symptoms doesn't mean autistic spectrum doesn't apply.

Also there remains this grey area between disabling autism and non-disabling, that is made to feel like a cliff edge you can fall over and out of diagnosis. You can be diagnosed with high functioning autism and not be deemed disabled. That doesn't mean it isn't affecting your life, and many people not deemed disabled with it still endure many difficulties and limitations that impact on their lives.

Yet we still suffer from ignorance, laziness and downright unprofessionalism in the medical, psychological, health and social services spheres, who consider their responsibilities do not extend to those not classed as disabled by it.

Particularly, in this country, there are some real jumped up little wasters who pronounce and parade their expertise on autism, who blatently ignore all of us outside severe. 

And reason we all remain confused, is that nobody really knows exactly.

I'm certainly no expert, but as I understand it, there are numerous physical brain differences associated with the condition, yes - but again, not fully understood currently.

There are definitely characteristics which are regarded as impairments - 'brain damage' if you must - hence the definite notion of the condition as disabling, yet there are also clear positives emerging too.

One example of this is the higher average IQ in autistics than in the general population.

Perhaps there are few other conditions that so precisely embody the idea of 'disability as difference' - every individuals ability is only defined in the context of their specific environment.

That said, our entire understanding of autism is founded upon behavioural examination - it is diagnosed behaviourally for example - making it very difficult to obtain a clear picture, and hence the strong stigmatisation of the condition.

It is rare to see articles presenting anything other than a negative slant upon the condition, such as the 'too many synapses' article that you posted to... as opposed to the neutral version of 'more synapses'.

'Neurodiverse' I would describe as a term that emerged specifically to combat the idea of autism being a disease, which was prevalent for a substantial period.

It refers to autism being within the field of acceptable natural human diversity, and a condition with positives in addition to negatives - hence the idea that any autistic individual is as 'worthwhile' as any given human being, not inherently flawed, wrong or inferior.

My personal theory is that it is a deliberately genetically triggered mutation, essentially positive at its core, but with considerable associated developmental risks.

Thanks for your comments.  Well I am not sure - maybe I am jsut borderline on the spectrum and am just a bit of a loner and an introvert - though I am quite happy to stand up in front of people and talk to them.

Also I have now just signed up to ADN which has some details on there about the spectrum, so I will have a look at that.    Our support worker sent me the link and lent me the book Aspergirls.  There is also an interesting article on it www.autismdailynewscast.com/.../

Thank you for your replies.   It seems a really complex condition.  I certainly have not been disabled as such - but I was very withdrawn as a child and have never been good at relationships or been a social person and have been quite isolated.

i largely disagree with dhagl1! Brain damage can certainly cause autism but most people affected by autism have inherited a set of genes that gives us an underdeveloped part of the brain that does social interaction. I, for example, am hopeless at facial recognition, have severe difficulty with eye contact and making use of non verbal signals. On the other hand I am very good at maths, physics etc and have a BSc, an MPhil and and MBA. All of these were obtained, along with my marriage of 30 years standing and two grown up sons, before i was diagnosed. My problems have arisen throughout my life and the latest episode resulted in my boss becoming very angry/violent and i was being put on a disciplinary track. So, my bit of the brain that does the social stuff is underdeveloped but other parts of the brain are perfectly well, or better, compared to "average". I can overcome the underdeveloped nature of the social bit by practice, understanding and asking for some reasonable adjustments at work. I don't feel disabled at all.

my genes mean that my father was eccentric, my uncles and aunts on fathers side have failed to sustain relationships, my grandfather pleased his wife by dying early! and his father was famously awkward and disagreeable. All of these did not have the benefit of the diagnosis that i now have. To me the diagnosis has unlocked my family's eccentricities. It is now a puzzle that i can solve and the solution has already lifted me out of a mass of stress and depression that has recurred in recent years.

Autism, unlike introversion, affects Theory of Mind  (the ability to mentalise). Unlike an introverted person, an Autistic person cannot access the social pool of shared meaning. An introverted person can function, unless the introversion results in isolation and Depression. My Mum is introverted but she can maintain a full time job, raise a family, take on adult responsibilities, and is not disabled in any way. Introversion is not a disability, Autism is!.

Secondly, not all people with Autism are introverts. It is possible to be Autistic and to be an extrovert, particularly if the person also has a co-morbid diagnosis of ADHD.

I understand Autism, in all its forms, to be a serious and disabling life-long condition. It affects people in different ways; some people have co-morbid learning disabilities and might need 24/7 supervision. Others, those with High Functioning Autism and Asperger's, might be able to attain some degree of independence, have a job, and in rare cases be able to have a relationship. However, in most cases, the person has few friends ( and sometimes none at all), because of the problems relating to people; they might need a lot of support in order to access the community; many are lonely and isolated. Co-morbid mental health problems are also very common, perhaps due to some inherent brain abnormality or chemical imbalance, although the AS way of thinking can also indirectly result in impaired mental health.

AS is a biological problem, but no physical tests for diagnosis exist. However, all people with AS share a common neuro-developmental profile, from infancy, despite the different manifestations, and a good clinician will be able to diagnose based on a thorough developmental history.

Although Autism is a life long condition, it is possible for individuals to develop new skills and to make significant progress.

It isn't a disease, but there are differences between the way an ASD brain is wired and constructed compared to NT people. Think of it that we are triangles and other people are squares. Neither is a better shape, they are just different with different strengths and weaknesses.