I wanted to share this story. Mostly because of how badly it is affecting my current relationship with my closest friend.
It started when I first came to university and lived in a flat with 11 others. And there was this girl there- CP.
CP was an incredibly beautiful and intelligent girl at first glance. Very likeable and polite for the first part.
Until time passed. I got her groceries (After making sure it was fine), and in general tried to look out for her. She soon began acting in a painful and humiliating way. She started a discussion about sex- which is something that causes me extreme discomfort. When it became apparent I didn't have a clue what she was on about, she said 'You're stitched up' to me.
She also turned out to be a bully. I knew she had ADHD, but I have that too and I don't treat anyone like this. She would call me names all the time when we were playing games together, sometimes causing me to 'shut down' and then pressing me if I was ever going to continue when I got upset.
One time, someone told me they would never speak to me again because I made cereal the wrong way and she supported them and also tried to make me feel I was doing it wrong and he was justified, an act which made me feel like I was losing my mind.
So, eventually it all became too much and I unfollowed her on social media and made it clear to my friend (Who then disappeared) that I did not want to play games with her- at all. He told me he liked her and she told him she didn't understand why I reacted like that. I eventually did let her play with us, where she seemed to be far more in control of herself.
Years passed. I have a nasty habit of reading news stories online, and I read one about how young women with mental health conditions are sometimes treated in the US. I imagined CP going through that and got properly terrified for her wellbeing. Yes, that's just what I'm like.
I reached out to her. I asked her about her health condition (she said it was just ADHD) and wanted to make it clear I was there for her if anything happened to her. She thanked me. I apologised for what happened in 2022 (even though I shouldn't have been the one who did), and she said she 'appreciated it'. That's it.
At any rate, we didn't talk for a few months until I got bullied out of a society because a popular girl got extremely offended that I asked her to stop swearing during training. I told CP about this. I told her everything I was feeling. I just wanted someone to talk to. She seemed helpful.
Eventually I became so grateful to her that I asked to meet her, and gave her a gift as thank you. She got so happy that she began pressing me for my birthday date. Although I really didn't like how she was saying she wouldn't be surprised if I had ASD, she gave me lots of 'advice' about DSAs that time.
I remembered how I once told someone from the same flat that she had 'beautiful eyes'. She enjoyed that comment. So I wrote CP and called her beautiful.
She just blew up at that. She said 'Whilst I understand you were trying to be nice', that wasn't appropriate to say, saying she was in a relationship, which I really didn't know for sure. I apologised for that and asked her if we were still OK. She didn't reply.
The next day, I wrote her good luck for her exam, which was that day. She told me thank you, but that 'I knew it was inappropriate and still said it', which wasn't true, that 'I can't be her friend', and so on, and blocked me.
I knew this broke my heart when I deleted our entire chat history. I just didn't realise how badly. When I tried to open up to my long-term friend and ask for help because of a bereavement, I was so scared of doing so I had repeated meltdowns, and all because of this story with CP.
What do you think?
