Published on 12, July, 2020
This is a bit of a heavy question, but have any of you found that you don’t grieve normally?
My dad died of Covid at the height of the delta wave, a week before the vaccinations started. Everyone around me was upset, crying at the funeral etc but I felt nothing at all and have never grieved. For me he was there and now he isn’t. The only thing I feel is disappointment in myself for not being more upset.
But I have since read that autistic people may not experience grief in the same way as neurotypicals. I can’t help likening it to the way I forget to speak to family and friends for months at a time. If people aren’t physically in front of me I don’t really think about them very much.
Ironically, I’m 100% certain that my dad was autistic too. He was a remarkably unsentimental man who would probably be irritated that I worry about this.
I have lost a few family members and my emotional response has been different for each.
However, my response to my mother's death was similar to what you describe.
I don't have Alexithymia.
This site talks about how a bereavement might affect an autistic person here:
https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/mental-health/bereavement/professionals
Also, is there a 'normal' with regard to grieving?
My condolences.
Thank you. That link is helpful