Are you conscious of how you come across to others?

For me friendship is not an automatic default despite it being my preference. As with credibility which must be earned, so too must friendship. My big problem is with maintenance of friendships.  I get bored easily, and my communication skills are poor face to face. My response is slow, if at all. Body language is above my head.

Well said. I echo that sentiment

ah but if you perceive everyone hates you then you are conscious that they hate you and therefore conscious that you come across to them in some way in which makes them hate you.

and yeah, i think its because normies have too much social interation maybe that they can afford to hate randoms and cast aside others.... where as we are limited social interaction and would more want to treat everyone as a friend as we lack friendship and social interaction. its the haves vs the have not attitude. the haves take it for granted as they have too much, so they cast aside and hate easy. the have nots dont have it so we cherish every relation and want to make everyone a friend.

No I'm not conscious of how I come across to others. Everyone hates me and I haven't got a clue why!

Thats nice of you to say. Honestly, there isn't a very long queue

JT I would love to have you as a friend......I  don `t meet many who are as upfront and honest as you, that is a good quality!!!!

Exactly. I often make mistakes or miss punchlines etc, but as long as I'm kind in my responses it comes off as my vulnerabilities. This can of course be jumped on and ridiculed by other parties, but I don't care because if they do then they aren't worth my time.

I reckon it as an approach to you all, honestly. Feels like I'm wearing a very thick, very kind, suit of armour!

Like your response!!......Just because you are considered `different`  should never mean you are the one in the wrong or the one that is wrong

I have always been very self conscious.

But recently I've made a breakthrough. If I ensure I approach every conversation by ensuring I am kind then it doesn't matter how I am received, that is out of my hands, I leave it knowing it wasn't me it was them

No but my assessment report says it all. Not one of them. Different. 

I wouldn't fake it. They also say "the best person to be is yourself, no one likes a fake". I think that's solid and true advice.

I suppose on reflection I'm acutely aware of making eye contact with others - or more accurately, not making eye contact with them. I find it uncomfortable. I have learned, over time, how to do it - and I always hope that I will be good enough at doing it that I won't stand out. 

I'm not very good at it though, it always feels like a conscious effort, or forced, even. 

I think my poor ability to make or maintain eye contact gives people a wrong impression. From this small thing, people make character judgements, it seems to me, and have often have decided that I am arrogant, rude, and dishonest. Without ever having a conversation with me,, or anything. I've had that a lot, that I'm 'hiding something'. 

Hmm, well, that isn't me at all. 

I suppose I am conscious of making eye contact. It's very hard to know exactly how to do it so that it doesn't seem unnatural. 

I relate to your comments here and wonder what people think of me or if I said the wrong thing or too much.

although yeah this on many occasions led to me being friends with people who are not my friends. first example was the person i thought i was friends with in primary school but was actually my bully. which only realised at the end of primary and start or high. i very well could be friends with people at work now that hate me to their core and are trying to get me fired which im trying to figure out if its a possibility.

no i tend not to think about it... until later i guess.

i want to be friends with everyone, so my default being friendly with everyone i guess makes me feel ok in my head and feel im doing ok.... but ofcourse, everyone else does weird stuff like read body language which my body language maybe not friendly, and sees that i dont speak very much, and so assume i hate them, instead of my own perception that im being friendly with everyone.

it then gets a issue that i cant read them too, when anything happens and i detect some sort of tension that i cant place and say..someone reporting you at work trying to get you in trouble and i cant figure out who it is and which one is being fake or sarcastic with me, it kinda sets me on a paranoid mode in which i dont know who to trust and i think of all the ways each person would hate me and why they would act against me in order to try figure it out, which then i try to think of how i come across to them and figure out any fault on my end which they could perceive as hostile to them. 

of which sometimes i feel my being friends with everyone likely causes a issue with some as if you be friendly with a person that another hates then they then hate you too for being friendly with the person they dont like. or perhaps see you as against them for being friendly with that person.

Yep, I do exactly this. I hate constantly asking for reassurance from the other person that I might not need to do that, but I feel like I'm being difficult. 

I am very conscious of how I come across to others. 

While I'm moving through the world I have a running commentary in my head like "Make eye contact, not too long, look away sometimes" and "am I talking too much? Am I not talking enough? Should I say something?" of if I make a joke I'm immediately plagued with "Was that a dumb thing to say? are people laughing at me?" it goes on and on. I find being alone easier for that reason because there are fewer variables and less to worry about. 

Yeah sometimes I'll make a joke that isn't intended to be rude but does end up offending that person, and it's frustrating that I didn't pick up on it. 

My situation is a bit different because I found a support network but because I couldn't deal with it, I threw it all away (I might make a thread on that).

I'm sorry that a teacher said that to you. It's those little things which often stick with us. I had hundreds of people tearing me apart on Twitter a few months back - it started out as them holding me accountable for something I did and quickly turned personal. That was much worse than any real life bullying I've ever dealt with because I really could not do anything.

Initiating conversation is something I feel less encouraged to do because of how it tends to pan out, and how much trouble it gets me into. 

Yeah, it's that saying of "don't take criticism from someone you wouldn't take advice from" (or whatever it is) and I try to operate like that.

I also only really speak up when I feel I have something to say, as opposed to speaking for the sake of speaking. To others it seems like I'm being standoffish sometimes but it's more energy wasted trying to jump in with a group conversation that I know I don't belong in.