Published on 12, July, 2020
Hi All,
I'm newly diagnosed with Autism. One thing that has come up a few times in my thoughts is I can now kind of avoid hugs with people I don't know very well (to be honest that feels like most people I see on a regular basis!)
I used to go along with it if someone initiated it even though I hated it but now I don't think I need to anymore. Does anyone have a way of avoiding hugs causing as little fuss as possible as I've noticed people seem to get offended if you don't want them touching you.
Sorry, I'm sure there's no right answer I'm just looking for tips / how others do it.
Eyes
I'm not a hugger either but I like kissing. In my imaginary ideal world it would be ok to say "no I'm not a hugger but can I kiss you instead?". I know that it doesn't work in our world tho hehe
I think the Italians do this nice thing where they air kiss. I may have to double check, but I prefer that, I'm okay with that when sometimes people do it with me, but I have no idea how I'd get that info "up front" either in the moment or just passively mentioning it to let people know I'd rather do it that way that isn't a really blunt mass sms chain to everyone I know lol, because I get the feeling the NTs in my life would misconstrue it as some passive aggressive rejection or something.
Yeah. It is definitely considered a romantic thing (I don't always see it that way, sometimes I'm just curious). Hugging is intimate as well tho. If I have to choose I'd choose the snogging thing. Sometimes I wonder how it feels like with someone. Maybe I'm just desperately lonely lol
Oh right you mean snogging. But presumably that only applies to a romantic partner anyway.I thought you meant like the kiss goodbye we sometimes end up doing on the cheek with relatives and friends.
Yeah, I'm actually not talking air kissing, I'm talking intimate kiss like the one in romantic movies. It could seem so gross specially if someone has dirty teeth or bad breath or simply rude, but otherwise I kind of prefer that to hugging.. maybe I'm gross.
But hugging someone who smells bad or rude to me isn't pleasant at all either