Any last minute tips for getting my GP to take me seriously when asking for a referral?

I've got an appointment with my GP this afternoon to ask for an assessment referral for ASC. This is on the advice of my counsellor and a mental health nurse I've been speaking with through Occupational Health.

Going from advice on other threads I've looked at the DSM 5 criteria and looked at how I meet them, as well as doing the AQ test and several others, all of which show a strong likelihood of ASC. I've made a list/notes to go through as I find pressured conversations hard.

Is there anything else I should do/say? It's a telephone appointment.

I'm a nearly 40 year old woman who has spent most of my life masking it seems, with the usual consequences of that in depression and anxiety, as well as digestive and sleep issues, all of which have stopped me being able to work and live my life at various times, including at the moment.

  • I very rarely use telephones, it’s an entire conversation of me saying sorry because I’m talking over someone else. I’ve said before, if you can’t see the other person, how are you supposed to know when to talk? Plus sometimes I’ve got something to say that really interests me so  that has to all come out in a way that sounds interesting to me!

  • I'm the same with non-scheduled phonecalls. My anxiety goes through the roof. Remember that you should be able to get a second opinion from another GP if this conversation doesn't go to plan.

  • Thank you. I'm trying to get my thoughts together for when he calls back, although the uncertainty on when that will be isn't helping. I'm hoping my husband might be back by then as he can deal with these sort of conversations much more easily than I can.

  • I sat down with the DSM 5 criteria and worked my way through making notes, as well as looking into comorbidities, and any ASC non-specific neurodivergent characteristics so I definitely had that covered. One of the questions from the AQ50 is not know when it's your turn to speak, or speaking too much, I pretty much hit both of those straight away!

  • Yes - yours is a fair comment.  It isn't my job to give myself a headache learning about autism.....but it is kinda their job to.......so when they get the basics wrong, they could (and almost certainly do) send some poor autistic brothers and sisters to the mental hell bin of well WTAF then now ?!

  • You're right, mate. It's just hard to be philosophical about it when we so often read of doctors getting the basics wrong. x

  • Thanks for the reassurance Steven.  I can be both needy and unsure.

  • Hi Becky, Idon't have any advice (sorry) you seem as prepared as you can be. Don't be afraid to pause to drink water during the appointment and think ifyou need to. Wishingyou the best, I know it's a tough situation. Thinking of you.

  • Dude - if I may be so bold as to say - 'don't be so / too hard on the doctors.'

    Autism is a deeply complex affair.  Before I realised that this was the root of my nature, I was probably about as ignorant and/or dismissive of the 'concepts' surrounding ' autism'.....it is the type of stuff that would give me a headache trying to understand....so I would have stayed a bit "arms length" perhaps of the finer details.  Perhaps to put it another way, I would have laughed, pittingingly at you or anyone else who suggested that I might "have autism."

    I don't fancy my chances of having a fulfilling path to a formal diagnosis....but I don't blame the doctors for that.....I blame the complexity of autism.

  • Christine McGuinness is another example, I had someone say to me that if she was autistic then she wouldn’t be able to walk up and down catwalks half dressed, what we choose to display is often smoke and mirrors, it’s an act or as we call it, masking. It’s not unusual for an autistic person to enquire for  an assessment armed with about ten A4  pages and not stop to draw breath. Don’t let the GP shut you down. They won’t see how exhausted you will be later for just taking.

  • This is really not helping my anxiety about asking for a referral and is making me doubt whether I am autistic, which I've been struggling with anyway, even with all the tests and the mental health nurse and counsellor telling me I should be assessed.

  • It'd probably be more straight forward if it were an in person appointment as I wouldn't have been able to meet his eyes and would have been stimming from the anxiety of it all. I hate speaking on the phone, it just makes things harder.

  • I'm going to have your message on my laptop when he calls back so I can say just that. I've never felt so unlistened to by a medical person.

  • I feel we should all take more life advice from Blackadder in general, although I refuse to wear my pants on my head because that's not how you're supposed to wear them, as the autism I apparently don't have won't let me use things in ways they're not intended to be used.

  • Due to some doctors' ignorance, autists now have to fake being autists in order to get treated like autists.

  • I'll mention the Chris Packham example as I explain that autistic people can be articulate, and that I had to force myself to talk as well as I could on the phone, it's by no means easy!

  • Yes very much so, I don’t think he had actually listened to what I had said, the Witch Finder manual had been looked at and I ticked a box, I know it’s being a bit devious but sometimes you have to give the crowd what they want. 
    P.S  Simon, I am a mechanic. Slight smile

  • It's like being obliged to deliberately smash your car up ahead of taking it to the garage, in case the ignorant mechanic says "Well, it's only a scratch - why did you bother me by bringing it here?"

  • Yet another gp with no idea about autism, most autistic people can walk and talk, Chris Packham articulates very well and is autistic. I explained to my gp about how autism affects my life, at the end of the appointment he stated that he was going to refer me for assessment as I hadn’t made eye contact for the entire consultation. I chose not to make eye contact, I could have easily looked at his chin, I knew eye contact would have been used against me. How sad is that. Unfortunately most doctors still see us very stereotypically.