ADOS MODULE 4 ASSESSMENT- insights?

I had the Ados Module 4 autism assessment yesterday & have no idea what to make of it. I've estimated that it'll probably be about a month until I get the results from it but the wait is going to kill me & I was wondering if anyone can help make sense of my answers & what the questions were looking for?

**** Please do not read this if you're waiting to be tested as knowing the answers could interfere with your results.

So the test went as follows:

1. I was asked to complete a puzzle-- to put M shaped foam pieces to match the patterns on a page to make a bigger picture. She only gave me 3 pieces at a time & said to ask her for more when I needed more. The first picture was unsuitable as the pieces didn't quite fit the shapes on the picture. I think my effort was reduced quite quickly when I realised they weren't fitting but nonetheless I remained calm. They said after a while that I could do another puzzle as the pieces weren't quite the right size for the original picture & I was quite relieved that I had another chance to do it properly. I asked for the pieces using the word please when I needed more so I think I probably scored NT on this one.

2. There was a picture book called 'Tuesday' it was completely bizarre & I think I struggled a bit with this one. It was mostly picture except for the occasional text that said something like "Tuesday, 9:15pm"- I didn't pay too much attention to that as I was trying to describe the pictures as she asked. She did the occasional page as well. I asked if I was supposed to focus on just one or both pages at the same time & she said whatever I wanted to do. I was asked to described what was happening in the picture book There were frogs flying on lily pads towards a house & into a house (I thought that this was some sort of infestation. They were also flying around blackbirds which I said seemed odd because frogs usually prey on insects. In another page, a man was looking rather perturbed eating a sandwich while frogs were outside his window-- I said I thought that maybe he was having a paranoid psychotic breakdown as he could see flying frogs & was quite hunched over which gave off suspicious vibes. I do feel I had to be prompted for the first few pages as I just couldn't make sense of it. There was also a picture of a woman sitting in a chair watching TV but she couldn't see the frogs & I suggested that maybe they were spirit frogs & only the man could see them? Then the frogs were chasing a dog & then being chased by a dog near the ground & on another page the dog chases the frogs. On the next page the frogs eventually flew into electricity lines & were falling- I was confused as to how the got up there when they were being chased near the ground (which in retrospect seems like a dumb thing to say as upwards would be a safer direction duhh). Then there was a crime scene investigation & the psychotic man was being interviewed I was confused by why they thought this was news worthy & why he wasn't just taken to hospital. There was also a sniffer dog in this scene & this confused me as sniffer dogs are only used in detecting illegal substances to the best of my knowledge l. There was also a page were the frogs were swimming in a pond- this seemed unrelated to them falling & when asked what this meant I said it's like they'd gone to heaven after falling. I was asked what this frog on one of the lily pads was feeling & I said he looked bored- they asked why & I said because he's leaning on one hand & looks annoyed & sort of did the leaning on one hand gesture. The next page though showed flying pigs & this confused me & when they asked what it meant I said that perhaps the frogs had reincarnated after dying & the pond page was like a purgatory. They then asked do you know what is meant by "when pigs fly?" I struggled to articulate but said I did know & it was on the tip of my tongue. Eventually I blurted out "fat chance"which they said was right. it's strange because that happens to be one of the very few idiomatic statements that I actually know--- my bf tested me on more saying later that day & I just couldn't answer them.

3. They asked about feelings. They asked what it's like when I'm happy & I said usually it's sparked by one of my interests & it's like a "phwah" feeling with butterflies in my stomach. I said something like it's nice. Anxiety- I said hot flashes & butterflies in my stomach. when asked about anger I just didn't know what to say & went off on a tangent about how when past alcoholics in my life did things that annoyed or upset me I would just feel nothing (like the calm before a storm) & told myself "it will be alright" but knew that anxiety was coming the next day & that worried me as it would make me feel bad & exacerbate my OCD. In the end I think I just denied I ever get angry & said that I am "pretty even tempered & have never hit anyone". They also asked me how I knew when someone is friends with me & I said because they want to see you again & do shared interests with you. And they were like "but how do you know if they are your friend" & I said something like "because they are nice to you". I also said that I couldn't imagine being friends with someone who didn't have the same interests as me. They asked how I knew my bf was bf & I told the story of how we got together & said that one of us asked what this meant & the other one said that they'd like us to be in a relationship but can't really remember that accurately. They asked me why some people get married & I think I struggled on this one. I eventually said that it initially makes people feel good to be loved but that I don't really see the point as a lot of people get divorced & it seems like unnecessary paperwork. when pressed though I said it seems like a nice sentiment at first & when asked what I mean by sentiment I think I said something like it's a nice feeling to be loved. I think they also asked why some people would want to live together & I said that it might make you feel more secure/safe. I was also asked what annoyed other people. I said lots of things but I wasn't quite sure what & they eventually derived evidence from a later anecdote I told- I don't think I needed much encouragement to talk & go off on tangents.

4. I was shown a picture with lots of people in it doing activities. I was asked what I saw & I just said what the people were doing. There were people sailing on a boat. I was asked whether I'd done this & I came up with 2 anecdotes of trips I went on as a child were boats & sailing were involved. I also came up with an amusing anecdote of accidentally hitting my teacher over the head live on TV with a canoe paddle. I think they found this funny but can't really remember their reactions. There was also a plane & I was asked if I ever flew on a plane I said I did once in 2011 & went into detail about the trip & why we were there. There were two women running & smiling listening to music- this one was pointed out to me by the assessor who asked "why do you think they are happy"- to which I replied that the sun is shining as it is today & that makes you feel good & sometimes gives me more energy depending on the state of my mental health. I did recognise they were smiling which indicates happiness which is probably quite NT.

5. There was a mini break where one of the assessors went to get water & I spoke to the other one about an earlier conversation of how send lots of emails repetitively was really therapeutic for me & gave me a sense of satisfaction & contentment. I was also asked what irritated me & I came up with an anecdote about buying a bottle of juice from the chippy but it had been dropped on the floor before being sold to me. Things like that cause a visceral sense of disgust & I get stuck on that feeling & it ruins the enjoyment of the product so really annoys me. I don't like food mess or things being dropped on the floor/having to touch the floor etc. it's hard to get past that.

6. I then had to act out brushing my teeth. They pointed to a space & pointed out an invisible sink, where the cold tap, hot tap, toothpaste was etc. I quickly asked if I could rearrange the order of things as this is not how my setup is at home so I wouldn't be able to do it properly. I said I would ditch the cup of water because I learned that swilling your mouth out actually reduces the adheisive qualities of tooth paste & therefore prevents adequate medicinal effects. They said that was fine so I said where the hot tap was etc. I think I did ok in this. I picked up the toothbrush, gave a detailed & precise demonstration of how I brush my teeth & all of the routine surrounding it done the very last detail of which hand I use to prevent visceral disgust at sputum leakage etc.

8. The final task was to make up a story out of a select number of objects. The assessor went first & seemed to personify one of the items so I decided this must be the done thing. She acted this car (toy car) going along a shoelace (which was a rickety bridge). The car was was apprehensive but its friend (a personified umbrella was at the other end so the car continued until it reached the umbrella friend. There was a sponge with was used to signify the car wash (it seems innhindsight). I chose a lollipop stick, a sponge (because I liked the look of it- I didn't say this but I felt like I wanted to chew it); a rubber ball with tassel like things around it (as the texture appeared & felt pleasing); a candlestick (which i decided would be the thing that i would personify like the assessor did- i called it lucy); she chose one of the items which was a car again. I took a short while & the put the car on the sponge & said the car was driving on the moon. He (the car) had invented a new game where you whack a ball around with a stick. But then the ball knocked over Lucy the candlestick. Lucy asked if she could have a lift to the spaceship so that she could go to A&E to be checked over. That was the end of it. I read on a forum after it that people do voices for the characters but I don't recall doing this. Really, they did just seem like unrelated objects to me & these are not the sorts of games that I would play as a child. My games were more realistic almost like soap operas involving people & real life issues.

*** If anyone could provide some insight into what my answers could've meant that would really help me as I'm scared of being invalidated in some sort of way & it just being a fault with my character. I understand no one on here can diagnose me but just an indication maybe from your own experiences of the ADOS MODULE 4 assessment would really provide comfort to me right now.

*** also for the cognitive assessment I think I struggled on recreating a picture with blocks but the pattern recognition one with the mini-blocks I got the hardest one right despite taking a long time & getting a migraine.