Driving

When I was old enough to learn to drive, my parents paid for me to have a course of 10 driving lessons (my birthday present). This was on the understanding that I would have to foot the bill after that. At the time, I was on a Youth Training Scheme (for people below a certain age, the YTS was similar to an apprenticeship), which paid an absolute pittance. As much as I wanted to learn to drive and pass my driving test, I couldn't afford to continue with the lessons AND fund the cost of things that I did not think I could possibly live without.

I am now in my late 40s and no nearer to being able to drive. To be honest, I am not so sure that I would want to now. Compared to when I was in my late teens, the roads seem so much busier now (I live in an urban sprawl), and there are a good many road users who seem to think The Highway Code doesn't apply them.

However, the older I get, the more I find myself thinking that the ability to drive may become a necessity. My mother is in her late 60s and I increasingly find myself thinking about what will happen when she's no longer able to drive. The majority of my relatives don't live locally, and some live in areas that cannot be easily accessed by public transport. I find it hard not to think of the difficulties that would arise if there was a family emergency or occasion (wedding, funeral, etc).

Apologies! I seem to have gone off on a tangent and failed to provide a helpful response to the questions raised.

I didn't even try driving until I was 25, didn't think I would be any good at it. However, I learned in a manual car and passed at my first attempt. I then drove for many years, at one stage I drove to and from Manchester and London quite regularly. I drove the 8 miles to work, but found that the particular choke pints on my route were really frustrating, I was driving ever more circuitous routes, and realised that a weekly bus ticket was cheaper than the cost of petrol, insurance, repairs and parking, so I started taking the bus. Stopping driving on a daily basis soon eroded my confidence, so now I only drive on routes I know, and just a few times a year; carefully avoiding the newer, illogical and ridiculously complex junctions that seem to be the fashion today.

It's funny, I've always beaten myself up about my driving phobia and failure to pass my test at 17. I got some stick from my family for it over the years, but my wife has always been very cool about it for which I'm eternally grateful. Learning that other autistic people can struggle with driving has been so helpful. It was also part of the jigsaw pointing towards possible autism. 

Lots of autistic people do drive, but so many report finding it inherently stressful. I enjoy cycling, and I'm quite happy to use public transport. 

I'm 45 and I don't drive.

I had one lesson when I was 17 and knocked over a small tree. I couldn't remember left or right.

I tried again in my 30s and got as far as my test, but failed at a roundabout because I couldn't judge speed and distance from orher drivers. 

I still struggle knowing when to cross the road as pedestrian ffs.

Thank you Former Member and Unicorn

It's good to find another thing I've struggled with in life has an autistic foundation.

Here are some funny things said to me during driving lessons by driving instructors:

'don't ever, ever, go around the corner at that speed again'.

'well, Debra, you caused havoc on the roundabout.  Why did you just stop?'

My answer was because I wasn't sure which lane I should be in

On my 1st driving test I reversed parked into a tree.

On my 2nd driving test I had the same person taking it.

Upon parking at the end of the test he said 'well, Debra, well done.  You missed the tree this time'.

I am thank you after some codeine, 2 CBD gummies and 2 cups of tea but mainly from shutting my front door on the world 

I think this is an autism thing. I tried learning to drive when I was 19, in a manual car, a 1980's Morris Marina, the gearbox wasn't easy and I just couldn't get the hang of it. It caused a lot of stress, anxiety and meltdowns especially during lessons. I failed so many times and as I pursued my medical career I gave up on it.

I returned to it aged 35 and this time I decided to learn in an automatic car as I just couldn't see myself mastering the gears. It was stressful and I did fail a few times but eventually passed I'm pleased to say!

I think we can make good drivers but it can be hard to pass at first.

I do find other drivers annoying. They don't use signals, they speed, cut me up. Pedestrians are stressful too, just walking out in front of us. I usually need to have a sit down and relax after driving.

My wife just passed her test, she enjoys driving if it's quiet enough. She avoids busy times on the road.

I hope you are ok now. It can be very stressful out there.

I'm in my 40s and can't drive. I tried when I was 17, had about 40 lessons but got nowhere. Never attempted it again. I used to live in a city and it was't a problem, but now I'm in the countryside. I'm adapting to a quieter, more isolated life but sometimes think it would be useful. My wife drives and is fine about me not driving. I have terrible spatial awareness, sometimes struggle to know left from right and I'm absolutely terrified of being in charge of a car. They kill thousands of people every year and I'm terrified of having an accident.