Published on 12, July, 2020
Good Evening All,
I would love to formulate a post diagnostic course for Autistics or even a book. One that contains all of the information that I wish had been available to me when I had been diagnosed. That information that you spend hours and hours foraging for in the information jungle that is the world wide web. Information that is slowly learned from time spent with other Autistics but that would be so much more convenient and time saving to have in a nice neat easy to read and digest format.
So, what information would you want to see in a post diagnostic course or book?
It would be good to address the 'imposter syndrome' that very many people seem to experience following diagnosis.
I've heard 'imposter syndrome' mentioned by a few. I've not really had it myself post-diagnosis, maybe before. I wonder what causes it?
I think it is a feeling in some people, me included, that have had adult diagnoses. We feel that we don't have some of the stereotypical traits that other autistics have - I have never rocked or flapped my hands - and are not as affected or limited by our autism as some other people. It makes us doubt the diagnosis and feel like our claim to be autistic is somehow fraudulent.
It is a very variable feeling in intensity. Intellectually, I know that I am autistic, but most of the time I cope. I am able to function in society fairly successfully almost all of the time. It is generated by comparison, and the feeling that one's own particular lot is very much easier than that of many other autistics. It is not logical it is emotional in causation, ironically, I suspect it stems from empathy, or at least sympathy for others.
I get what it is, I just wondered what caused it. I'm probably being too scientifically minded though, as if a neural pathway could somehow explain imposter syndrome.
What I would say, with regards to feeling not as affected by autism as others, is this: Myself, I've always been a socially inept and obsessive Autistic who did well academically and professionally. My youngest daughter, also Autistic, is 4 and she does rock and hand flap and she is affected by her Autism quite a lot. She is still mostly pre-verbal; has HUGE sensory issues and general developmental delay. In some ways we are Autistic opposites. But yet, there are so many Autistic behaviours that my youngest engages in, that trigger memories of myself doing the same at the same age: the sentence echolalia; the repetitive head shaking to self regulate; the restlessness and being unable to sit still, particularly in church for some reason, and needing to be taken to the back room for the last half of the service. I could go on as there are so many parallels. My point though, is that it's the same old Autism in both myself and my daughter. There may be a huge difference between the level of our support needs, but Autism is Autism and I can see clearly that it is the same in both of us. It's just that we are all individuals and we will have a different combination of symptoms from the spectrum. No need to feel like an imposter.