I am potentially at huge risk from midday, next Wednesday. If you only had 5 days left to BE, to EXIST, what would you do?
Go on the holiday of a lifetime. Why worry about anything serious if I only have 5 days left? May as well enjoy them as much as I can.
Hope all is ok? Huge risk doesn't sound good!
Why worry about anything serious anyway? What exactly does worry add to the situation? Just curious ~ does it help in a way that if you didn't worry the solutions would never be found? It's just that for me, I found that if I worried about a situation, it didn't change anything and I couldn't find a solution because my head was too full of worries. So I gave it up and don't bother with it anymore.
And why not enjoy every day you have on this planet as we never know which one will be our last?
I find it curious that people would enjoy five days but not the whole of their lives!
I guess some of us have much more to worry about in our lives than others, BlueRay. Just thinking 'Oh, I'll choose not to worry about anything any more' doesn't always cut it.
Meantime, I'm worried about Ellie. Or maybe I should say actively concerned.
Worrying is just one of many reactions a person can have to a problem or problems.
Personally, I found that when I worried, I didn't solve my problems, in fact, they somehow felt worse, it was like all I could think about was the problem and never the solution, that didn't even come into it! When I realised that worrying wasn't helping me, I stopped and found I was much more able to solve my problems when I wasn't spending all of my time worrying. So I would say, the more problems people have, the less they should worry as they will get much further in solving their problems if their minds are free from worry and therefore free to solve problems.
But maybe it's just me, I'm pretty intense so when I used to worry, the worries would almost take over my life. I'm sure I even worried when I was asleep, and honestly, some days, it was all I could do, I would worry all day long. Can you imagine! I would be all day going over and over the problem! Insane! So maybe it's just me, and worrying isn't so intense for other people and maybe then it's a helpful strategy for solving problems. It just didn't work for me that's all, so I found other more effective methods to solving problems.
As for Elli, I'm doing as much for her as I can right now, if I was to start worrying, I'd never get anything done and I'd be of no help or support to her but as it is, it looks like I'll be able to get up to see her very soon.
Yes, and being incredibly lovely and helpful :) - I usually have a clear and logical head.... but sometimes if my logic seems to fail me or a clear view is not seen...then I can panic a bit!
Lots of anxiety dreams last night... clear attempts this morning to move things forward...
the wave and the undertow.... :)
If I was in your shoes right now ~ which I never would be because I could never fill those elephant boots ~ I'd be a mess ~ you're doing amazingly well and how you keep your head as clear as you do I will never know, you're amazing and it would be more than acceptable for you to panic a bit now and again.
Funnily enough (I don't know why I use that phrase because it's not really funny at all') ~ I had a dream/nightmare about the ex narc last night! I tried to go back into it (the dream) and change the outcome which I think I did, but I think it's more to do with me thinking about you. I know I tend to look more to the future and all the positives etc but I still remember what it was like when I was going through it and I don't want anybody to go through that, especially not our Ellie and in many ways I wish I was in a stronger position to be able to do more but not because you can't handle it, because I know you can, you're strong, but just to give the equivalent of a friendly hug and a bit of friendly support X
I'm thinking of scrapping the idea of getting my car back on the road because I don't want to stop walking everywhere so instead I'm considering hiring a car when I need one which I reckon will work out cheaper than paying tax n test etc for the whole year. It won't be long before I can make my way up the country and give you an aspie hug - or we could end up like this -
Been a positive day today... the wave was kind... yesterday the cuurent got me.
everything has its biorhythms... this is just an unfamiliar and scary at times tune.