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Just got diagnostic report and I scored 7 on the Empathy Test

Xanadu
over 5 years ago

Hello

I'm really sorry if this is one of the boring questions that gets asked a thousand times.  I got my diangostic report and I scored a 7 on the EQ test.  I know the difference between cognitive, affective and compassionate empathy.

I'm sure that my affective and compassionate empathy is Ok.  I am constantly feeling guilty.  I care about humanity, animals and I have 6 children who are my whole world.  I'm just a bit shocked by this score nevertheless.

I am VERY blunt.  I am very literal and I can't always work out what other people are thinking. Working out what other people are thinking drives me crazy.  I try to avoid doing it and I do what I do.  I also try to stay away from people as much as I possibly can.  I like a few people, thankfully one of them is my husband!!  I experience all emotions except jealousy I don't really ever feel that.

I know the differences between the different kinds of empathy but it's not me I'm worried about.  Other people don't know do they?  Other people are still stuck in the dark ages and think Autistic people are devoid of any feeling.

I've had real mixed feelings about this diagnosis.  At first it was like relief.  Then it was like being liberated but slowly as I realise all the additional 'assumptions' this label is going to bring I'm not sure it's a great thing anymore.  Or at least it is and it isn't.

I was hoping this diagnosis would bring me some understanding.  I'm starting to wonder about that.  Is it just going to bring me even more MISUNDERSTANDING if I share a report with a professional and they see my EQ score is a lowly SEVEN :O 

I don't know, when you stick a label on yourself, suddenly everyone is an expert!!  It's so tedious !

I'm not sure I can take much more misunderstanding to be honest with you!

Parents
  • over 5 years ago
    Xanadu said:
    I know the differences between the different kinds of empathy but it's not me I'm worried about.  Other people don't know do they?  Other people are still stuck in the dark ages and think Autistic people are devoid of any feeling.

    That’s sadly too true, which is why I carry this around with me to help explain:

    I also often drop in that people actually want to be more sceptical about those who come off as charming and thoughtful, because psychopaths often present this way i.e. people that appear as though they care may not really care and those who appear they don’t care may actually care but not be very good at expressing it (such as us autistics). That’s usually enough to confound people and make them question their perceptions of others, which is a start...

Reply
  • over 5 years ago
    Xanadu said:
    I know the differences between the different kinds of empathy but it's not me I'm worried about.  Other people don't know do they?  Other people are still stuck in the dark ages and think Autistic people are devoid of any feeling.

    That’s sadly too true, which is why I carry this around with me to help explain:

    I also often drop in that people actually want to be more sceptical about those who come off as charming and thoughtful, because psychopaths often present this way i.e. people that appear as though they care may not really care and those who appear they don’t care may actually care but not be very good at expressing it (such as us autistics). That’s usually enough to confound people and make them question their perceptions of others, which is a start...

Children
  • over 5 years ago in reply to NAS36609

    While that poster may be true for you and many others here, it is a massive generalisation.  I have very little compassionate and affective empathy.  My cognitive empathy is based on logic and seems to be better than many with ASD, but it's more of an analytical tool rather than anything emotional because I don't have the the affective and compassionate empathy to back it up.

    My EQ score was 1 (one).

  • over 5 years ago in reply to NAS36609

    That is so true!!!  Actually I find the whole neurotypical presentation very dishonest.  I know it all seems to make people like you but actually if it's not genuine and it's done just to be social then actually it's a tiny bit of manipulation really?  Anyway I know I have blind spots to certain things.  When someone points it out it seems very obvious but I don't get it at first!!