Published on 12, July, 2020
Does anyone get upset at vague instructions that you're expected to just 'get' and yet can't?
Like "Put that cup over there", when there are three cups and 'there' isn't defined? Or "move it back a bit" when "back isn't specified as a direction?
And frequently getting it wrong...
it gets tedious
A big ask in an NT world...I find I am constantly interpreting and filtering* to find meaning....
Give me specifics and absolutes!
Get pickled onions! ;-)
I have executive functioning issues with the same result, Little short term memory to remember instructions or lists or names sequences etc I too need to write things down but then I also get shouteat if I’m the one not giving the clear and precise instructions, directions, requests which seem clear and precise to me but not to the person listening.. Yes I find huge assumptions that I can follow or easily do the instructions because I can be slow to listen, process and then action I get into trouble for being slow or at least not responding quickly enough. This is a bit tricky when it’s something like stop Be cause whilst my brain catches up my body keeps going.
Yes for me as well!
If I ask a colleague for directions they automatically assume I know where they are as they describe the route, I then say “hang on is that by the pub?”
They say yes or no, but if I still don’t really know where the pub is and ask? They repeat the exact same thing but with a raised voice and a look that says are you stupid or something? I then shut them out as any respect or feeling I have toward them goes out the window( the middle one Lol)
I also struggle to remember strings of information due to small working memory area! I forget the first bit before they have finished.(dyslexia)
I would like to say” hang on can I write this down” but they invariably would think it unnecessary and their whole body language and tone would be demeaning, A bit like people who shout louder if speaking English in Russia ,thinking the louder you shout the more it will be understood?
()
so next time, buy five onions.
Then, before the next weekly shop, figure out how many onions are still left. Adjust your purchasing quantity to ensure you have as many "spare" as you want.
Our family has a menu for the whole week planned out every Saturday morning, so we can estimate our onion usage accurately in advance.
I’m the same....
i hate open ended statements which don’t easily lend themself to a clue as to how you’re meant to answer them.
lazy nt people...lol
The one situation that upset me recently was the way the instruction was phrased.
Perhaps you should consider trying this.
What they meant was. This is what you must do.
Yes, I could indeed answer the question! ;)
It does bother me. If they won't refine the question to the point where I understand it, yet still get upset if my response is not what they were after.
Good to hear from you Disambiguating Cynosure...... YES x
Yes - All the time. Unfortunately, I expect everybody to think the way I do. Anything less than ultrapedantic to the nth degree willl set me off: If I let it - I've been trying to stop stuff like this bother me for years.
Actually I do this as well. People do get annoyed. As if I have thwarted their oppertunity to "tell me off". It happens so often that I hardly care anymore... yet if I can, I still Run Away...
Can you just answer the question....yes or no! X
If instructions are unclear, I often respond with "I may need more information for that" or "Can you refine that a bit?".
It's often enough to get the person making the request look at me and pick up on the puzzled expression. A raised eyebrow can often help here.
Some folks take longer to stop issuing vague requests than others, but it does free up the log jam in my head when I'm not sure what I should be doing.
Another person advising me upon how to Reply upon this Thread, for example: "Alright, now scroll down... no! that's too far... go back up and hit the *Pink* button... no, not THAT Pink button... go up a bit more... wait, there are two pink buttons... so go to the top... yes, that one... now type in a reply and hit the pink button again... no! not that pink button, I meant scroll down a bit again and hit *that* pink button... no, not that pink button!... yes, that one... finally, okay, you did it, why can't you do what I said in the first place?"
...In short... Yes, I also get a little annoyed at ambiguity as well. (!) I always take things literally and appreciate specific instructions, so that if they go wrong, it is not entirely my fault...
Absolutely! For example my wife often just writes 'onions' on the shopping list (I usualy do the weekly shop) without putting how many...does my head in cos I'm supposed to know!
Yes